


Harbor Road

by hat_full_of_stars



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - 19th Century, Alternate Universe - Historical, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Lena Luthor Gets a Hug, Non-Linear Narrative, and I kinda want one too but I wrote this instead, self-indulgent discussions of 1890s technologies and literature
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-06
Updated: 2021-03-12
Packaged: 2021-03-17 18:20:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 34,552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29229870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hat_full_of_stars/pseuds/hat_full_of_stars
Summary: Part I - West1896. Lena Luthor, the daughter of a wealthy family, meets Kara Danvers, a shoe-maker who struggles to make ends meet in a small shop she runs with her sister. The two of them become friends. Over the course of one year, they learn that more connects than separates them.1897. Kara is at the harbor early one morning to witness the arrival of a steamer full of newly-rich miners and sacks of gold. The arrival brings about a change to the city she has called home all her life, and she worries what will become of Lena and the infatuation that they share.
Relationships: Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor
Comments: 8
Kudos: 46





	1. Chapter 1

* * *

**Part I**

**\- West -**

* * *

_1897_

Kara is bored. She is sitting on the countertop, and the unrhythmic _thud-thud-thud_ of the back of her heels hitting the worn wood echoes through the small workshop. It causes Alex to glare in her direction every once in a while. The sound of the rain hitting the window adds to the grim mood between the two sisters.

 _Thud_. Kara lets out a long sigh and continues to watch Alex as she works on a pair of shoes besides the gas lamp, the only source of light in the room. _Thud. Thud._

“Stop that!” Alex hisses, and Kara chuckles but complies.

She jumps from the countertop and walks towards Alex.

“Has this pair of shoes not been finished since yesterday?” she asks and sits down at the edge of the working table.

Alex only sighs and pushes the shoes away from her. “They have, but we do not have any other work today, do we? What have you done all day, Kara, besides sit in places you are not supposed to like a house cat?”

Kara grins at that. “I read the newspaper that Eliza brought home last night. They sell candy sticks for a cent less at the grocer’s on 4th Street now.”

“How exciting!” Alex rolls her eyes. “Are there no other news in the world these days?”

Kara shrugs. “I suppose not. Maybe tomorrow I will go and buy a tin of candy sticks. I haven’t had any in a while.”

“You will not,” Alex replies and crosses her arms. “We are so poor that we will have to eat the soles of our shoes if this continues. You will not spend what little we have on unnecessary rubbish.”

Kara wants to protest, wants to argue how candy sticks are a reminder of her childhood days, but she decides against it. It seems best not to push Alex’ buttons too much these days.

“I know. I’m sorry.” Kara says instead and bites her lip.

Alex’ expression softens. “It’s not your fault. But we need to put dinner on the table, you know this. Speaking of which, we will have to use the potatoes tonight before they become bad.”

Kara nods. She gets up and paces around the room, then stops with another sigh. “I will go upstairs and finish a book that I need to return to the library by next week.”

“That is a fantastic idea, if it keeps you from further damaging our inventory. You might even tidy up the stack of books on our vanity and fold the clothes you have neglected to-“

“Now, let’s not get too ahead of ourselves here-“ Kara retorts and makes a dash towards the door near the counter that leads to their living area. Before she gets there, however, there is a knock on the shop’s front door.

“Come in!” Alex yells, and Kara turns around to see who it might be.

“Lena!”, she exclaims when the figure takes shape in the dim light of the shop.

In contrast to her own excitement, she can see Alex’ expression falter out of the corner of her eyes. It is clear that her sister would have preferred a paying customer over Kara’s friend.

Lena shakes her umbrella and smiles at Kara, who has rushed to her side and engulfs her in a hug. It’s the first time Kara sees her this week, and Kara holds onto her a moment longer than she usually would. They separate when Alex clears her throat behind them.

“Hello, Alex.” Lena greets her in a friendly voice, but Alex only acknowledges her with a nod.

Kara is quick to quell any awkwardness before it ensues, a task she has learned to master over the last year. “What brings you here, Lena? And in the rain? Your jacket is quite soaked!”

Lena shushes her. “You needn’t make such a fuss over me, Kara. It is quite alright. I wanted to see you, simply. And I brought something.” She holds up her leather purse and Kara eyes it with interest as if she could see the insides through the thick fabric.

It makes Lena giggle. Kara’s eyes shine bright with the excitement of having her friend there so unexpectedly, and she touches her arm, urging her to open the purse. Lena pulls out a paper bag, and the sweet smell of frosting makes Kara’s mouth water.

“I bought pastries,” Lena announces.

Kara engulfs her in another hug. Lena laughs and playfully pushes Kara away. “Careful not to crush the pastries, Kara.”

“Let’s go into the kitchen, I will make tea.” Kara says when they pull apart, and gives a careful glance in Alex’ direction.

She already knows that Alex hates it when Lena brings them things, but she expects at least a little bit of enthusiasm on her sister’s face. Alex, however, remains seated and watches the two friends with a somber expression.

“Oh, I snuck into the kitchen today so I could get tea and some sugar,” Lena mentions almost in passing as they make their way across the room.

Kara lightens up. “Oh, you didn’t have to!”

“It is quite alright, Lord knows nobody will notice for there is an abundance of it in our cabinets,” Lena shrugs.

They’re in the kitchen, and Lena puts her purse down onto the old kitchen table with a familiarity that makes Kara feel warm. The fact that Lena comes into their old, run-down home voluntarily at all is something that amazes her still, when she has a whole mansion in which the seats are comfortably cushioned.

“We’re not a damn charity case,” Alex voice comes from where she is standing in the doorframe.

Kara turns around. “Why can’t you be happy that Lena is so kind to buy us food every once in a while, as a favor? You said just earlier, we’re so poor that we will have to eat the shoe soles if this continues and-“

Behind her Lena takes in a sharp breath at the same time as Alex scoffs. “Oh well. If it satisfies both your socialite ego and the bottomless pitch that is Kara’s stomach, then who am I to complain.”

Kara lets out a long sigh and decides to ignore Alex. When she turns back around, she can see the hurt clear as day on Lena’s face. She mouths “I’m sorry”, then takes out the mis-matched china and tea cups from the cupboard.

“Four pieces?” she asks with wide eyes when she opens the bag.

“One for Eliza,” Lena mumbles.

Alex ducks her head, and Kara feels a little big victorious knowing that Alex feels ashamed right now, that she would never choose her own pride over a piece of pastry for their hard-working mother.

“Thank you, Lena. Forgive my harsh words, Eliza will be quite happy. Our dinners have been quite dull these last few weeks.” Alex bites her lip.

Lena shakes her head. “It is quite all right. I know you are not fond of me, but my intentions do not come from a place of superiority. I simply cannot stand to see others struggle when I lack nothing in my life. I do hope the pastries are to your taste.”

Alex swallows and nod, then grabs a plate and walks towards the door. “I will eat this in the shop and leave the two of you alone.”

Lena and Kara exchange a glance once Alex has left. Kara shrugs. “I’m sorry, she is easily upset these days. She worries about the shop. We have not had much work to do recently.”

“Is it truly so bad?” Lena asks with concern in her voice. “I could give you money to put an ad in the newspaper.”

Kara sighs and rubs her temple. “Thank you, Lena. But I’m afraid that the problem is not that nobody in the city knows us, but rather that nobody needs new shoes. And besides, you can buy them off the rack much cheaper now. People cannot afford individually manufactured pieces these days.”

She fills the kettle with water and puts it on the stove. Lena is eating her piece of pastry, pulling it apart absentmindedly.

“Sam said the same thing,” Lena says after a moment of silence. “Not many people need new dresses, and they tend to mend their clothing at home these days, not wanting to spend money on a seamstress.”

The kettle whistles, and Kara carefully prepares the tea. She places one cup in front of Lena, who accepts it with a smile. Kara puts a small amount of sugar into hers. She eyes the small jar as if it contains gold. To her, it might as well.

“I know. Ever since Jeremiah’s passing- “ Kara pauses. Lena knows about her adoptive father, but yet she has difficulties saying it, even after all these years. “- business has not been the same. No one is more aware of that than Alex.” Kara pulls apart her own pastry and shoves a piece in her mouth.

“These are really good. Thank you, Lena.” She smiles at her friend.

Lena reaches for her hand from across the table and gives it a squeeze. “I’m happy you enjoy them. I just wish there was more I could do to help.”

“You are doing more than you think. Now, do tell me how you spent your week? I missed you.” Kara interlaces her fingers with Lena’s. 

“Oh, the usual. Mother is increasingly busy with the correspondence for the company. I do not think she expected it much, but I do admire it. With my father and my brother still away, she is keeping the business alive. It is essentially her own business, and is that not something?” Lena’s hand doesn’t move away from Kara’s, who is listening attentively.

Kara nods. “Oh, it surely is.”

“And a benefit of this is that she spends all her time in the study these days,” Lena says and grins, “so that I am free to roam around the house and garden, she leaves the kitchen maids alone and they do not care if I steal some sugar and tea.”

Kara laughs. Lena winks at her, then slowly untangles her hand to take her piece of pastry. Kara finds herself missing the contact at once and scoots closer on her chair. She closes her hand around the cup of tea instead but finds it still too hot to drink. The kitchen is stuffy and warm, the rain outside only adding to the humidity instead of cooling the room down.

“Oh, but at dinner she talks about my brother, father and Benoit coming back any day now. It is a little unnerving. I do not know how she could possibly be so sure, their last letter reached us in November. But I am unsure whether to be excited or terrified. I have been so comfortable since they left. I am afraid they would …” Lena gulps and looks down at the table. She traces the wrinkles in the table cloth with her finger.

Kara reaches out again and puts a hand on her shoulder. “That they would restrict your freedom?”

Lena nods. “I have enjoyed far more freedom in their absence than I would have ever imagined. Why would they condone that? I am to be married and made a wife and mother.”

Kara feels tears burning in her eyes the way she always does when she becomes aware of the wasted potential of Lena’s life. Lena is smart and kind, and frankly too good for her family. She despises the way her fiancé treats her. And above all, Kara wants nothing more than to have her in her life every day, to have deep conversations and find comfort in her touch.

Lena notices the tear rolling down Kara’s cheek and shifts in her seat. “It was silly of me to bring this up.” She pulls Kara into her arms so that Kara’s head is resting on her shoulder. Kara’s hand rests on her thigh, tousling the fabric. She takes in a long breath, filling her senses with Lena’s expensive perfume. Lena presses a soft kiss onto Kara’s hair.

“It’s just-“ Kara starts, but Lena shushes her.

“Shh. No need to talk of it. We have talked about it too many a times. Let us simply enjoy the present.”

Kara nods then. Lena feels soft and warm, and Kara wishes she could stay like this forever. They have to part when they hear the door between the shop and the living area creak and footsteps approaching.

Alex walks in and thanks Lena for the pastry, drinks a cup of water and walks back into the shop. Lena and Kara stare at each other in silence for a moment. Kara takes a sip of her tea.

“Jack wrote me a letter,” Lena says nonchalantly after a moment and eats the rest of her pastry.

Kara feels the pang of jealousy that tends to accompany his name, but she bites the inside of her cheek. If anything, out of the men in Lena’s life, he would be the one to fear the least. “Does he have news?” she asks.

Lena nods. “He tells me he sold his stationary business in London, and has moved to New York with a new business partner. Oh, but he will not tell me what his new business does, he says it is a secret for now.”

She continues, eyebrows furrowing. “It is a pity I cannot go and meet him. Mother would never allow it.”

“Well, it is nice of him to write to you, maybe you have the chance to visit him one day.” Kara offers.

She has never been to New York, but she hangs onto every word Lena tells her of it and has spent much time staring in awe at the illustrations in Lena’s magazines. She is silently glad that Lena will not travel alone, she imagines she would not sleep soundly until Lena was safely back in Seattle.

Lena smiles. “Yes. I deeply value his letters.”

Their conversation moves onto other topics, never a dull moment in its flow. Kara soaks up as much of Lena as she can, how free her laughter sounds in the small kitchen, and how her dark hair shines under the dim light. It is much later when a glance at Lena’s pocket watch tells her she has to rush home to not raise suspicions. They hug tightly before Lena leaves.

That evening, Eliza praises Lena for bringing the pastries, and Alex does not utter a single bad word about Kara’s friend. It makes Kara feel warm, and she selfishly wishes the Luthors would never return so she may keep Lena by her side and not worry about anything else.

***

Kara wakes with the first rays of sunlight filtering in through the dull glass of the window. She blinks once, twice, and is fully awake the next moment. Something is different, a feeling in her gut tells her the moment her head clears from the fog of sleep. She rubs her eyes and sits up. Alex is still sleeping on the bed on the other side of the room, snoring lightly.

She gets up from her mattress, stretching her stiff back. She looks around the room. There is nothing different about it at all. Their shared vanity is a cluttered mess of books and random items, and Alex’ work clothes are carelessly thrown over the old chair in the corner. Kara puts her arms around herself, subconsciously trying to ward off the imminent, inexplicable feeling of change.

She climbs down the narrow staircase into the living area behind their shop. She’s washing her face over the sink when she hears it. Outside on the street there is a loud commotion. People are shouting, the voices of men entering Kara’s quiet morning routine. She can hear the clatter of horses being rushed down the street. She dries her face on the worn towel. When she opens the back door to use the outhouse, she can see a number of carriages on the street, rushing towards the direction of the harbor.

It’s a Saturday, and the shop doesn’t open until 10 am. It is a time usually spent with her family at the breakfast table, but Kara feels drawn towards the commotion. She goes back inside to finish washing up and quickly changes into her work clothes from the day before. She uses the back door to slip out of the house. No signs of anyone else having woken up are coming from the upper floor.

When she turns from the alleyway onto Harbor Road and in front of the shop, her eyes go wide. What her ears picked up before could have never prepared her for the chaos that has dispersed in front of her. People are rushing to get to the wharf, and before she knows it Kara finds herself joining them.

A rush of adrenaline starts pumping through her veins. What does it all mean? Is it another war? She had been born after the great civil war, in a place remote from its cruelties nonetheless, but she had heard stories by older people. She shudders to think she might live through a war during her time.

“Gold! Gold! Gold! Gold!” The shrill shouting of a news boy brings her back from her thoughts.

Gold? Kara’s heart takes a leap.

She reaches the waterfront. There, emerging from the morning mist on the water, is a ship. She remembers Lena’s words from the day before. Gold! The Luthors! Lena’s family must be on the ship. It makes her head spin.

“Gold! Gold! Gold! Gold!” Another news boy is standing nearby, holding out a stack of papers in his hands. People are flocking to him, grabbing the papers so quickly the boy barely has time to put the coins they give him into his pockets.

Kara’s chest tightens at the sight. She had done a similar job on Sundays until recently. In contrast to now, however, there had not been enough people to buy the papers. Not many people liked to read about recession and unemployment on Sundays, it had seemed, and Kara had lost the little extra income it had given her family. She imagines herself in the boy’s position now and briefly wonders if this news mean she could get rehired.

She fishes for her last five cents in her own pocket, grateful to be wearing yesterday’s clothes and to never listen to Alex to store her money in a safer place. As if someone would be looking to steal five cents from a girl who works at a footwear shop.

She buys the newspaper, her eyes flying over the headlines. True to the newsboy’s advertisement, there it is in hasty print: _Gold! Gold! Gold! Gold! - Sixty-Eight Rich Men on the Steamer Portland!_

She barely has time to read the rest of the article. The crowd around her becomes larger by the minute. She looks up and sees the ship docking on the wharf. She grips the newspaper and it creases beneath her fingers, staining them with the fresh print.

The Luthors. Kara knows without knowing that they must be on the ship. The Luthors are back, together with sixty-five more men, and all of them are rich. She begins to look for Lena in the crowd before it strikes her as impossible. The crowd is moving towards the dock, a loud, all-consuming mass.

At the opposite end of it all, behind the steep roads of the city, the sun has risen above the hills, if barely. More people are coming down the streets. It is a scene unlike anything Kara has ever seen.

An uproar goes through the crowd, and Kara sees the gangplank being lowered from the ship. A moment later, a couple of bearded men appear, looking out at the people while they go on land.

“Show us the gold!” A voice breaks free from the crowd. There is a beat of silence, and then more people are demanding to see the gold.

The men smile as more and more of them leave the ship. They hold up sacks in triumphant gestures, some big and some small. Sacks of gold.

The people on land start shouting, cheering, demanding to see what’s inside the sacks. It’s overwhelming, but Kara can’t help but look on. She recognizes Lex Luthor among them, only with a beard that she does not remember him having before. Next to him is another young man, holding up a sack of gold with a grin on his face. Benoit, she thinks. Lena’s fiancé. She has never met him, but she instantly understands why Lena finds him repulsing.

Kara has never met Lena’s father, and it takes her a second to figure out which one is him. When she does, she feels her heart tighten in her chest once more. Leaning onto Lex for support as the men begin to disembark is a man whose age is hard to guess. His head is bald, and his eyes are tired, a stark contrast between the mass of lively young men showing off their newfound riches. He is clutching a sack of gold close to his chest, and he seems to be looking out at the people on land.

Kara wonders if he is looking for Lena, and she follows his gaze across the crowd. It is impossible however, for the crowd blends together, and she can’t make out Lena’s dark hair or her slim figure from where she is standing.

The people around her start talking loudly about the men leaving the ship. Kara hears that the Luthors have accumulated more than 70.000 dollars worth of gold. The number makes Kara swoon. The Luthors were wealthy before, but now … her train of thought takes her to Lena again.

Lena, who has felt suffocated by her family’s status all her life. Who longed to see her brother and father again, yet not the fiancé she shared nothing with. Who had regained something resembling freedom in their absence, even. She wonders once more if Lena is here in the crowd, or if she is still soundly asleep in her bed.

Her heart aches for Lena, and for herself. The imminent feeling that everything is about to change becomes overwhelming. The freedoms they had built for themselves for the last year, she can practically see them crumbling to nothing with each step that the Luthors take off the ship and into their lives again. Suddenly, she feels frantic. The reminder that she might not be able to see Lena anymore brings tears to her eyes. It’s a reminder to how different their lives really are.

Lena will wake up today and touch real gold. Kara will go back to the workshop and try to make ends meet. She clutches the newspaper in her hands. Taking one last look at the ship, she turns to go.

“Gold! Gold! Gold! Gold!”, the newsboys are still shouting all around her.

More people gather to buy the special edition of the Post-Intelligencer. Kara stuffs hers into her pocket, not caring about any crinkles, and makes her way back towards the shop. Her stomach is rumbling, and at least Eliza will be up already, getting ready for her morning shift at the hospital. Kara hopes her absence hasn’t worried her yet. Or maybe Eliza has noticed the commotion on the street by now, wondering what it is all about. She imagines Alex still snoring in her bed and laughs to herself.

When she turns around a street corner, she wonders if this discovery of gold will have a lasting effect or if the craze will die down by the end of the day. She doesn’t have to wait long for her answer. In a few short hours, the city of Seattle is changed forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello lovely people,
> 
> thank you for reading my new fic! i'm so happy to finally share this. i've been working on it since 2019 (remember 2019? good times), but 2020 gave me the opportunity to spend every waking minute thinking about and writing this story. doing research for this was a lot of fun, and i learned a lot. the klondike gold rush and the 1890s in general have kind of been a niche interest of mine for a while, and what better way to self-indulge than to write fic about it, am i right?
> 
> the story is told in a non-linear way and consists of two parts. i have already finished it completely so updates should be frequent. i hope you all like it! i'm always happy to receive comments and kudos and feedback!
> 
> take care and stay safe!


	2. Chapter 2

_1896_

“Is this it?”, Lena asks her brother. She turns around to him, adjusting her hat with one hand.

Lex looks up at the sign above the door. The letters are faded and the color is mostly flaked off. “Danvers Footwear, est. 1880” is still legible, if barely. Her brother nods and knocks on the door. He doesn’t wait for a response, however, and pushes it open in one motion.

Lena bites her tongue, not in the mood to remind her brother to be polite to people. Usually quite the gentleman, he has, like the others in her family, troubles to extend his good manners to people not within their direct social circle. Lena sighs and follows him into the workshop.

The inside is only dimly lit, and her eyes take a few seconds to adjust. Two young women are inside, appearing to have been mid-conversation. One of them is sitting on a chair next to a working table, the other on the counter at the back of the room. The woman’s eyes go wide when she sees Lena and Lex enter, and she jumps off the counter.

Lex makes a grimace when he sees it and takes off his bowler hat. “I have a job for Mr. Danvers,” he announces, foregoing a greeting. “I need six pairs of waterproof men’s footwear by next week. Introduce me to the craftsman.”

Lena subconsciously adjusts her hat again. She wishes that wider hats were in fashion so she might pull it down to hide the embarrassment on her face. She can nevertheless feel the eyes of the two women on them, going back and forth between herself and her brother.

The first woman gets up from the chair and lifts her chin. Her hair is dark brown and undone. What shocks Lena, however, is the fact that it doesn’t reach her shoulders. She is not sure if she has ever seen a woman’s hair this short, and she finds herself staring at her.

“The craftspeople are standing in front of you.” The woman’s words shock Lena even more so, and she can hear her brother take in a sharp breath next to her, too.

“Mr. Danvers passed the shop on to us. We’re his daughters, and I promise you we are just as skilled as any man. Six pairs until next week is much work, but not impossible. How much do you pay?”

The confidence in her voice pierces through Lena like a blade of steel, and she finds herself more intrigued by these two sisters with each word that is exchanged between them. Two young women running a business with their hair down! Oh, Lex will have a complaint as soon as they are out of the door. She half expects him to turn around and look for another shoemaker, even.

Lex, however, only crosses his arms and lets his eyes dart across the room. “Very well,” he starts, and lets his gaze linger on the brunette woman. “I shall pay $4,50 per pair. Expect me back within the next few days to examine the progress.”

The woman looks surprised for a split second, but quickly schools her face back into a neutral expression. She nods and walks towards the counter, where the blonde has been watching the exchange. Lena allows herself a closer look at her. Her brows are furrowed as if she is trying to find a fault in the deal that Lex has offered. Lena has to admit that it is a lot of money, but Lex is a man of his word and will pay every penny, so long as the quality matches the price.

The blonde catches her gaze, and Lena quickly looks away and once more wishes for a wider brim of her hat. She feels her cheeks grow warm, and curses her pale skin for exposing each and every blush. Even in the dim light of the shop, she is sure the other girl can see it.

“That’s agreeable,” the other woman states and pulls out a writing block and a pencil. She writes something down, then looks up at Lex. “May I ask your name, Sir?”

“Luthor.”

Lena winces at the self-assured way he says it and watches as both women’s eyes go wide in recognition of their family name. Even if not many people outside of their socialite circle may know their faces, in the short amount of time that the family has resided in Seattle, most of the people in the city have heard their name or seen it on advertisements. It is not something that Lena is eager to be reminded of.

Lex pulls out a five-dollar bill and walks toward the counter. He places it on the worn wood. “Accept this as a pre-payment to cover for material costs. I expect excellent quality, and if one stitch in the leather is off, I have the leverage to let everyone in the city know how women are incapable of doing a man’s job.”

“Yes, Sir. Understood.”

The brunette accepts the bill and punches a few keys in the register, but Lena can hear the blonde snort. She looks at her to find her quickly covering her mouth and receive a glare from her sister. Lena suppresses a grin. While it is true that Lex could realistically run their business to the ground, from the lack of materials being strewn around and the leisurely way the two women had been in when they had walked in, Lena supposes there is not much to do about it, either way. Besides, even if they manufactured the best shoes in all the Pacific Northwest, Lex would not tell a single soul it was the work of a woman.

Her eyes meet again with that of the blonde, and this time there is a certain curiosity behind them. Lena lets herself take a further look at the woman. Her hair is down, just like her sister’s, but it reaches far over her shoulders, wavy and wild. It is then that Lena realizes that she is not wearing a corset but only a simple cotton shirt, the sleeves rolled up. It is a men’s shirt, Lena notices, and for some reason that makes her heartbeat pick up. Her arms are tan and muscular, and the shirt must have once been white but is now covered in stains not even the best maid could ever wash out.

Lena wants to drag her eyes up, to observe the business transaction taking place, but she cannot help but notice that the blonde is not wearing a skirt either. She is wearing a pair of dark-blue bloomers instead, and _oh!_ , Lena had only seen those on women in Paris riding their bicycles. All of a sudden, it feels like her head is spinning. She swallows and looks away, but she can see the smirk tugging on the woman’s lips out of the corner of her eye.

“Your receipt, Sir.” She is brought back by her brother accepting a piece of paper with a nod.

He puts it into his coat pocket. “May I ask your names, for a future visit?”

The woman behind the counter looks him in the eye. “Alexandra Danvers, Sir. And my sister, Kara.”

_Kara_. Lena finds the name most unusual. For being sisters, the two women look nothing alike, and the fact does nothing to quell her interest in them.

She wishes she could hear Kara speak, but the blonde only nods at being introduced. Lena wishes she had more time to get a grip on the most unusual combination of menswear and sportswear that she is wearing, but Lex signals that it is time to leave.

“I will be back in a few short days,” Lex states and puts his hat back on.

He turns around without another greeting, and when Lena doesn’t follow suit immediately, he grabs her arm to signal for her to move. Lena winces and doesn’t dare take another look at the two women.

Outside on the street, the sunlight suddenly seems harsh to Lena’s eyes. Lex does not seem to mind, however, and walks on, upwards and then turns right towards Pioneer Square. Lena struggles to keep up with him and curses her choice of fairly new shoes for the day – she can feel a blister forming at her toe.

When they stop at the next intersection, Lex turns towards her. “I can see the pity in your eyes for these two poor souls even now. Oh, how horrible it must be for them to be without a father, to have to labor like a man! I decided to spare myself the lecture and to assign them the job before you lament in my ear for the next week.” The sneering tone in his voice is unmistakable.

Lena bites her lip. She had felt curiosity towards them rather than pity, but she knows better than to tell her brother any different.

“You are correct, brother. They need an income, and you know I believe it does not matter who does the manufacturing as long as the outcome is of good quality. I am grateful you assigned them the work.”

“You have a bleeding heart, Lena.” Lex reminds her and huffs. “A redeeming quality for a nun, but not for the future wife of a successful businessman. Maybe in our absence you will find your place within the family, at last.”

“Maybe.” Lena mumbles and digs her nails into the palm of her hand before she makes a regretful statement.

The reminder of the reason for their visit to the shoemaker fills her with sadness, nevertheless. To think that her brother will be gone in a matter of two weeks, off to unexplored lands in the search of the country’s great riches.

Lena thinks it silly, for they are already rich. She is, however, quietly grateful for the fact that her father and brother will be accompanied by the man they had agreed would marry Lena upon their return. She can get by without his presence.

They visit a hat maker’s next, as Lena had promised her mother to find a hat that fits a new dress she had in the making. Lena finds nothing to her liking and she foregoes walking to another shop as Lex looks impatient to get home.

She spends the rest of the afternoon reading on the back porch. When Eve, her maid, serves her a piece of pastry and a cup of Ceylon tea, she puts the book aside and watches the gardeners tend to the yard.

“Is everything alright, Miss Luthor?” Eve’s voice cuts through her thoughts.

Lena looks up and realizes she has not yet touched the pastry.

“Yes, Eve. Why do you not help yourself to a cup of tea and join me for a while?” She attempts a smile.

Eve has only been with their household for a year, and Lena cannot deny that she misses her old maid. But the girl had refused to make the move to the West coast from New York, and Lena could hardly blame her.

“Of course, Miss. I have a couple of minutes to spare before dinner preparations begin.” Eve hastes inside the house to fetch herself a cup.

Lena tears the pastry apart and puts a piece into her mouth. It’s sugary sweet and seems to melt on her tongue. A perfect complement to the Ceylon tea.

Eve returns and sits down. She doesn’t attempt a conversation, and Lena feels grateful for it. She is not in a mood for small-talk. Rather her thoughts drift back to the shoemaker’s shop. She idly wonders what the Danvers sisters are doing at this moment. Are they starting their work on Lex’ shoes already, or are they closing up the shop for the day? She wonders if they take an afternoon break, what they eat for dinner each night. Something tells her their dinner does not come with pears for dessert, and she stuffs her mouth with the rest of the sugary pastry before she loses her appetite.

Two weeks later, she finds herself sitting on the back porch again. The ship taking her brother, father, and fiancé to Alaska had disappeared behind the horizon that morning. Lena bites her lip to stop her tears from falling, takes off her engagement ring to stuff it into her pocket, and thinks about Kara Danvers.

***

The next time Lena walks down Harbor Road, it’s on a cloudy day with Sam. As soon as the shoemaker’s shop comes into view, her heart starts beating faster. She feels foolish, but for a moment all she can do is stop in her tracks and stare at the house further down the street that sits between a Chinese laundry and an empty storefront. When Sam stops walking as well and looks back at her with an expectant look on her face, Lena realizes she must have asked her something.

“Where was your mind right now, Lena?” Sam laughs and shakes her head.

Lena clears her throat. “I’m sorry, I was reminded of something. What did you say?”

“I asked you if you mind that I will stop by the toy shop before we go home. I haven’t an idea what to buy Ruby for her birthday. It used to be much easier when she was small and happy to be given a doll or a toy train.”

Lena laughs at her friend’s exasperated expression. “Of course. Where is it?”

Sam points down the street. “Right over there!”

Lena blinks. The shop seems to be across the street from the shoemaker. Her heart starts pounding again. She has never spent much time in this part of the city, her family preferring the fancier shops around Pioneer Square. The street car does not run on this road, only crossing it at an intersection further down. Taking a good look now, she realizes the road is quite steep and provides an excellent view of the harbor and the endless water on the horizon.

It has been a week since her brother, her father and her fiancé left from the very same harbor, Lena watching as the steamer disappeared on the horizon. Even her mother had been unusually solemn, however Lena could not be sure if it was for her husband leaving or for being left behind with her adopted daughter. Lena sighs.

Her gaze is drawn back to the old house on the other side of the road. The paint on the sign is so worn off, she cannot read the shop’s name from where she is standing, and she would be overlooking it completely had she not known where to look. For how much she misses Lex already, she is still upset with him for not taking her to pick up the shoes. A chuckle escapes her lips. What a silly thing to be upset about.

Sam tugs at her arm. “Don’t stand around all day, Lena! I mustn’t be back home too late; I need to prepare dinner for Ruby and I.”

They make their way down the road and stop in front of a shop with a wide showcase and a chalkboard in front of the door that reads _‘Schott & Son Toy Shop – handmade toys that every child will love’_ and in a smaller font beneath _‘now selling boardgames for all ages!’_. The display shows dolls and a variety of wooden steam engines and ships, but Lena has no time to look at them as Sam already steps inside.

A bell rings upon their entrance. Unlike the shoemaker, the inside of this shop is bright, even despite the cloudy weather outside.

They’re greeted by a young man who gets up from his stool behind the counter as they walk in. “Good afternoon! How may I help you today, ladies?”

Lena ducks a little and stays behind Sam, not wanting to be directly addressed, or worse – recognized. The departure of the men in her family had made news around the country, with the socialites discussing fervently the merits of searching for gold in the wild North. It was something Lena quietly questioned herself – her family was already rich, why the journey into the unknown? Weren’t the stakes too high? Not according to her brother, who was determined to explore the possibilities the land further Northwest had to offer. Even though Lena is unsure how much a toy manufacturer would care about such talk – she does not wish to draw unnecessary attention to herself.

Such hope quickly becomes naught as Sam and the shopkeeper start browsing and her gaze lands on the person sitting by the counter. She does a double take, and when the recognition filters in she has to firmly grip her umbrella so as to keep steady. Blue eyes look back at her in wonder, the woman’s mouth an ‘o’-shape, the recognition clear as day on her face.

Kara Danvers. Her blonde hair is in an up-do this time, if not properly done at all. Instead of the dirty work shirt that had so drawn attention to her muscular arms, which had not left Lena’s mind since she had caught a glance in the workshop, she is wearing a clean blouse, its high collar without any ornamental stitches. Her maroon-colored jacket is unbuttoned and slightly out of fashion, but it suits her well. Kara is staring at Lena in a much similar fashion that Lena is staring at her.

Lena clears her throat. She wants to say something, but the words escape her. It seems to startle Kara, however, who rubs at her cheek with the back of her hand. Lena can hear her mother scolding such unlady-like behavior in the back of her mind.

“You’re the Luthor daughter. You came to my shop.” Kara says matter-of-factly, like she has to say it out loud to convince herself that Lena is not an apparition.

Lena can only nod. It is the first time she hears Kara’s voice, and it is unlike anything she had imagined. It is thick and sweet, like honey.

“Your brother was most friendly, and his order provided us with much needed work. I hope the shoes are to his satisfaction?” Kara remains sitting on the stool, and Lena’s heart sinks when she realizes she is only making polite conversation.

It makes her wish she wasn’t the daughter of a wealthy family but instead any ordinary working girl, someone easy to befriend. Kara seems to be on edge around her, well-aware of her family’s status. Just for once, Lena wants to be talked to because the person has an interest in her, not because they did business with her brother or father. She gets this inexplicable urge to get to know Kara, to talk to her.

She looks down, then up again. “The shoes are most decent, excellent work. He has already left for Alaska where they will be of upmost importance to him and the other men.”

Kara nods in understanding. Lena is sure that she must have already read about it in the papers. In a moment of small bravery, she takes a step forward and meets her gaze.

“Kara is your name, isn’t it? I must say, it was a welcome surprise to learn that you are running the shop with your sister. I apologize that my brother was rude in the beginning.”

Kara stares at her for a long moment, and Lena almost feels discouraged. What a silly thing to say. The sisters must have endured some awful ordeal with their father having passed, and having to labor in his stead. What a foolish hope, to think she could strike up a conversation with a shoemaker’s daughter whose weekly salary she likely spent earlier on a cup of tea and a piece of cake.

But then Kara takes a deep breath and runs her hand through her hair, seemingly not caring that more strands come undone and fall in her face. “Thank you. Eh, people have been ruder to us over the years, it’s alright. I must say I’m shocked you bothered to remember my name at all. What’s your name?”

“My name is Lena.” Lena says and feels her heartbeat quicken again.

Kara smiles at that. “That’s a very pretty name, it suits you well. It’s nice to meet you, Lena.”

Lena has to tighten her grip on her umbrella again, but she manages to return the smile. Kara finds her name is pretty and that it suits her well? Has she just called her pretty? Lena cannot help but focus on whether the compliment was there or not, and she tells herself to get a grip. She has been called pretty before, but there is something about the way Kara says it that makes it sound genuine. Like Lena can believe her when she says it.

A silence stretches over them, and it makes Lena want to jump out of her skin. She looks away from Kara and into the shop, where the man and Sam are taking out board games from the shelves and talking animatedly.

“You must wonder why I am here instead of at my workshop” Kara says. Her gaze has followed Lena’s, and she giggles. The sound makes Lena turn back around.

“Winn over there is one of my oldest friends. His family has always had their shop here, at least since I … well since I’ve lived across the road. There is no business today and Alex said I was getting on her nerves, so I came here.”

Lena can only nod. She has no idea how to tell Kara to tell her more, that she wants to know what her day to day is like. There is something unique about the way Kara speaks, and Lena wants to listen more to figure out why. Kara sounds more well-spoken for her status than Lena would have expected, even if the way she stretches her vowels seems to betray that. It’s a contrast to the rough, direct way that her sister had spoken.

Before she can decide on what to say next, Winn and Sam come back. Sam holds up a small boardgame case and grins at Lena.

“I have found quite an interesting game. I hope it will make Ruby sit still for more than ten minutes at a time for once.” She places it on the counter and reaches for her wallet.

Winn seems to look at Lena for the first time, and looks between her and Kara. They’re still quite far apart, but it is obvious they were mid-conversation.

“Are you … oh! Miss Luthor?”

Lena blushes, but nods.

Winn looks to Kara. “Are you and Kara acquainted?” His tone of voice gives away the unlikeliness that he thinks of the possibility.

Sam gives her a strange look and looks between her and Kara, too. Lena feels crimson creep up her neck.

“We’ve met briefly before, yes. I told you about the order from the other week, Winn! What boardgame did you choose, Miss …?”

“Samantha.” Sam smiles.

Lena appreciates that Kara has deflected Winn’s question. There is nothing to it, really. They had met once, briefly, to be surprised to meet again by coincidence. Lena might be curious about Kara, but that is not for the others to know.

“I’m buying a game that is based on a woman traveling the world all by herself, I remember it from the papers, maybe six or seven years ago!” Sam explains.

Kara’s brows furrow, it is evident that she remembers no such event. Winn looks like he wants to say something, but then his shoulders sag as he looks at Kara. Lena cannot put a finger on it, but Kara’s mood seems to have shifted, her expression darkening. She looks down at her hands.

Winn quickly walks behind the counter to ring up Sam’s purchase. He briefly puts his hand on Kara’s shoulder, then begins typing into the register.

“That will be one dollar and fifteen cents, please.”

Sam pays and engages Winn in further conversation, but Lena cannot seem to tear her eyes away from Kara. Kara sits there unmoving, looking at something in her memory, out of everyone else’s reach. In another act of bravery, Lena takes another step towards the counter and leans her arm on it. It catches Kara’s attention, and she gives Lena a small smile.

Lena realizes that she has no plan for what to do next. It results in them staring at each other for a moment until Kara gets up and meets her at the edge of the counter. She leans against it with her shoulder, her fingers tapping on the wood. Standing this close to the other girl makes Lena’s heartrate pick up again, but she cannot bring herself to move back. Kara is two or so inches taller than her, Lena finds. The earlier sadness has been replaced by curiosity.

“I understand it’s a game that lets you imagine you travel the world, like this woman from the newspapers.” Kara’s voice is firm, but there is a teasing undertone to it.

“Say, Lena, have you travelled anywhere before?” She tilts her head in question.

Lena gulps. “I … I have.” She suddenly doesn’t trust her own voice to speak.

“I was born in Ireland, in fact.”

Kara raises an eyebrow in surprise. “Really? I was not aware the Luthors were Irish?”

“No, not the Luthors.” Lena lets out a low laugh and tightens her grip on her umbrella. “Just me.”

Understanding dawns on Kara’s face, and it looks like she wants to say something but they’re being interrupted.

“Oh, what a blight, it has started to rain again,” Sam laments as she walks towards Lena, looking out of the shop window onto the street.

“Let’s hurry home Lena, before the horses rustle up all the mud onto the sidewalks.”

Sam turns around and thanks Winn, then she is out of the door. Lena stands rooted to her spot. She has no mind to leave. She wants to ask Kara what made her sad earlier, and if she has travelled overseas. But Winn looks at her with a strange expression on his face, and she does not wish to be another Luthor causing trouble.

“Thank you, what a lovely shop. I wish you a pleasant afternoon,” she says and takes a last, quick glance at Kara.

Kara is still staring at her, but Winn waves at her and returns the sentiment, so she quickly turns around and follows Sam out of the door.

On the sidewalk, Sam is looking at her with a curious expression. “I had no idea you were acquainted with that girl.”

Lena blushes. “As she said, I went to her shop with Lex before he left. I would never know her in other circumstances. You know how my mother is.”

“Then why are you blushing, Lena?” Sam is walking beside her and tugs on Lena’s arm to get her to stop. It’s drizzling, the rain making a prominent sound on their umbrellas. Sam smirks.

“I’m not blushing,” Lena tries to deny, but her body betrays her and her cheeks glow red.

Sam only hums in response. “Hmm. I might fancy some new shoes for the summer. I will let you know if I pay a visit to her shop.”

Lena’s eyes go wide. They continue their way up the street until they reach the intersection with James Street.

“I wish to take the street car home, it will save me a bit of the way.” Sam announces.

Lena nods. Sam walks towards the stop and checks the time-table. They say their goodbyes. Lena opts to walk home despite the rain, claiming it will clear her head.

The rain falls hard by the time she reaches the Luthor house, but luckily her mother is not there. She instructs Eve to prepare her a bath, and she spends the rest of the day thinking about her encounter with Kara. Once more she finds herself wishing that her last name, that provides her with a maid to run her bath, didn’t also come with the burden of forlorn hope.

***

“Lena!” Her mother’s voice coming from downstairs startles Lena so much she almost breaks her ankle in her haste to get up from the bed.

She barely has a second to straighten her night gown and fumble for a handful of pins to put in her hair before there is a knock on the door. She sighs and strides across the room to answer it.

Her mother raises an eyebrow as she looks Lena up and down, taking in the state of her daughter this late in the morning. Lena can feel the scrutiny prickling on her skin, but she decides to ignore it. It’s not like she has anything better to do than lounge in her chamber in her night gown these days, anyways.

“The mailman just brought this.” Lillian holds out an envelope and makes a grimace as if it contains poison.

Lena’s heartbeat starts to quicken when she sees the baby-blue envelope.

“I must say I find it highly inappropriate of you to still be exchanging these letters when your fiancé is away, putting his life at risk to ensure you will live a golden future -,” Lillian scoffs and shakes the envelope, signaling for Lena to take it.

Lena takes it. It’s open. Of course, her mother would never let anything go past her. She shakes it to better get a view of the inside. There’s a letter, and more paper. Magazines. She pulls one out and almost yelps when she sees the French writing on the cover.

“- but I will tolerate it given the circumstances. I cannot have you sitting around the house all day, if you take this as an opportunity to brush up your French then I shall allow it.” Lillian finishes and taps her fingers against the doorframe.

Lena had almost forgotten her mother is there at all.

“Thank you, mother” she replies and looks up. She gives her a sincere smile. The mail had been long overdue, but its content eases any anxiety Lena may have felt towards its delay before.

Lillian clears her throat. “I will be downstairs to overlook the new maid. The clumsy thing almost broke Lionel’s Chinese vase last week.” Then her mother is down the stairs again.

Lena only hums in response. She is rather indifferent to the décor; their house is full of it. She slams the door shut and rushes to her vanity, where she sits down and pulls out the rest of the magazines and the letter. To her surprise, the seal is still intact. Overwhelmed, she takes a second to stare at the stack of paper in front of her.

There are three magazines in total. One is a copy of La Mode Illustrée, the spring issue. The other one is a French paper she has never heard of, and an English magazine called “The Lady’s World”. She studies the covers curiously, and is pleasantly surprised when she finds them all to be recent.

She breaks the seal and opens the letter. The handwriting is neat, clean and familiar. _My dear friend Lena_ , it starts. A smile spreads on her face the more she reads. At the same time, the reminder of what could have been is a dull knife in her chest. She misses her friend, now more than ever. What she wouldn’t give to see his handsome face, to share a whiskey over an intelligent conversation without having her opinion dismissed. To discuss current affairs over the fresh print of a newspaper without being looked down upon.

_I was able to get my hands on these three papers that should be of your interest as per the postcard you sent me from Paris during your travels. I hope not to instill a longing for the Old World but to provide a comfort and a source of inspiration in your new home of the New West._

_Holding your friendship dear to my heart until we meet again, Jack._

Lena runs a thumb over the piece of paper. A single tear runs down her cheek, and she is quick to catch it lest it stain the ink. She misses Jack. Fate permitting, she will meet him again someday. She looks out of the window. The rain is hitting the window the same way it has all morning. She tries to imagine herself sitting on a balcony in Paris, overlooking the bustle of the street below on a sunny day. She sighs.

Looking back towards her vanity, she wonders what the magazines all have in common, what interest of hers Jack had had in mind. To think that he would be shuffling through a magazine, find something that reminds him of her, and go through the troubles of sending it to her alone makes her tear up again.

She opens the French magazine. An illustration of a dress catches her eye. The pattern looks unfamiliar, modern and new in a way she hasn’t laid eyes on in over a year. Of course, it is the latest fashion from Paris. Until it arrives in Seattle, the fashion in Europe will have already moved on to the next season. She makes a mental note to show the cut and pattern to Sam the next time she sees her.

She looks through the table of contents. Fashion words in French she is familiar with, as it had been a favorite pastime of her friends in New York to study the newest trends from Paris. Her interest in the subject had been marginal, more in the acquisition of the language itself. Her breath hitches in her throat when she reaches the second to last item:

_La Louie Fuller – la danseuse étoile. La page 21-22._

She opens the page in a haste, almost knocking off a bottle of perfume. An illustration of the dancer is in the center of the page, made to catch the eye of the reader, the fabric of her costume reflecting the stage lights in a swirl of colors. Lena bites her lip. Jack had remembered. She had given a short reflection of the show she had attended in Paris on her postcard. However, she hadn’t dared to put all she had heard and seen at the theater to paper.

She jumps up and out of her chair and rushes into the hallway. At the corner she comes to a sudden halt as she is face to face with Eve.

“Miss Luthor, you gave me a start! Are you alright?” Eve clutches the freshly washed table cloths she is carrying.

Lena quickly regains her composure. “I am excellent, Eve. I must simply fetch something from the study.”

Eve tilts her head. “Mr. Luthor forbade that you go in there alone-“

“I will return to my chamber at once.” Lena interrupts, making a dismissive gesture. “Oh, and Eve, be so kind and bring me a cup of tea and a biscuit when you are done with your chores?”

“You know how Mr. Luthor feels about eating in the upstairs chambers …”

“But he is not here now, is he?” Lena smirks, and Eve nods timidly.

Lena has no intention to be rude to her maid, who she is aware is only trying her best. However, she cannot help but feel annoyance towards her maid’s complicity towards her brother and father.

Lena dismisses Eve with the raise of an eyebrow and continues her way towards the other end of the hallway. Her father’s study is well organized, and she finds what she is looking for at once. She remains there for only a moment longer, taking in the unusual quiet of the room. Usually, her brother and father would be sitting on the Mahogany desk, discussing business and world affairs. Oftentimes Benoit would join them.

Their absence is a positive in Lena’s life, all things considered. And yet, the house feels awfully quiet. The maidens, the chef and the gardeners are the only ones filling the dullness of the day with life. Her mother is busy attending to the business in her father’s absence and terrorizing the staff.

Lena takes a deep breath and takes a step towards the desk. A globe is standing on it, daring its observer to contemplate whether every last bit of it has really been explored, named, noted and mapped. Lena runs a finger along the coast of the Pacific Northwest, wondering if the rough cliffs and steep mountains have already brought her family to their knees, or if they run at all like the map suggests they do. She gives it a spin and the globe creaks. Her finger lands on Paris. She lingers for a moment longer, then remembers why she came here and goes back to her chamber. The French dictionary is heavy in her hands, and when she puts it down onto her vanity the perfume bottles clink.

With trembling hands, she opens the dictionary and begins reading the article, looking up words every now and then. The article goes in depth about Fuller’s visionary stage show, and when Lena has finished, she reads it a second time. She is so engrossed that she almost misses the tentative knocking on her door. It’s Eve who brings her the requested tea and biscuit. Lena thanks her, then goes back to the article. The tea becomes cold next to her as she loses herself in a day dream about her travels to Paris and her visit at the Folies Bergère nearly two years prior.

It hadn’t been the woman onstage herself that had drawn her in so much. Or rather, the dancer had not been what one would have expected. She was unlike the women in the magazines – her face rather dull, her body rather plump – and yet Lena had been fascinated by her the second she had stepped on stage. The way the stage lights had created the perfect illusions, the way her costumes had filled the space of the stage.

Lena takes a sip of the cold tea. The rain is still hitting her window as she turns the page of the magazine. With clammy hands she reads a section that has her heart beating fast and her head spinning. It reminds her of the gossip she had heard from Parisian women sitting next to her in the audience, talk that she had prayed would not reach the ears of her mother.

_Fuller is a homosexual_ , the article states, in the same scandalous tone that has been ringing in Lena’s ears since Paris. _She lives with a woman who dresses like a man, and she is not ashamed to admit it!_

She shuts the dictionary with an audible thud and puts her elbow onto the vanity. There is something about this dancer that fascinates her, and the gossip about her lifestyle does nothing to quell it. In fact, it only fuels it more. A woman, living with another woman, loving another woman. Lena cannot help but want to know more. She knows about men loving other men in secret. In fact, Jack had admitted to it when they had talked in London, calling himself a ‘sworn bachelor’. The idea of a woman loving another woman, however, is so peculiar, yet so unnervingly mundane to Lena that she finds herself lost.

As if pulled by a string, her thoughts turn to Kara and her men’s work shirt and bloomers. Lena grips the edge of the dictionary tightly. Since meeting her, Lena had been feeling most strange. It seems like every second that her mind is unoccupied, it wanders towards the blonde. Thinking of Kara feels much like thinking of sitting in that audience in Paris, as if Kara is on the stage in Lena’s mind, illuminated by the vibrant colors that make Lena want to never look away.

Suddenly, Lena cannot stand to be in her chamber a second longer. She craves to see Kara, to do something about this unnerving turmoil that has taken ahold of her.

She gets up and quickly reaches for her pocket watch on the night stand. To her surprise it is almost 11 o’clock, the morning has flown by. Nevertheless, she figures that it’s not too late to go out and be back by lunchtime. She rushes back to her vanity and opens the small drawer. It already contains the last letter Jack sent in January, and a copy of Vogue and Harper’s Bazaar. She stuffs the new letter and magazines into it.

“I look a fright,” she mumbles when she sees herself in the looking glass. Her hair pin is hanging loose, and she realizes she is still in her night gown.

She rushes towards the sink and sprays water on her face and combs her hair. She changes into the first blouse and skirt that she finds in the closet, and clumsily ties the corset herself, finding it too much of a hassle to call Eve. Besides, she would rather not give a reason for her sudden need to go out.

The thought makes her stop short. She has no reason to actually show up at Danvers Footwear, she realizes belatedly as she puts on her shoes. She lets out a long sigh and sinks down onto the stool. She and Kara Danvers are not friends. She cannot simply go to her house like she would go to Sam’s, or Kara to Winn’s shop.

She opens the clasp of her shoe with a sigh and drops the shoe onto the floor. Her eyes dart around the room, but then she quickly looks back to her new pair of shoes on the floor. She takes a deep breath.

“Lord, forgive me for what I’m about to do,” she mumbles as she reaches for the right shoe.

She takes it into both hands, the metal of the clasp cold against her finger. She pulls. At first, nothing happens save for the hard leather cutting into her skin. Tears of frustration form in her eyes. She huffs and pulls again, this time with all her force. The clasp finally gives way and comes off. Glue and seam are visible. She sighs a sigh of relief.

She scrambles to put on another pair of shoes, then puts the new pair into her tennis bag. She rushes downstairs to find her mother. Lillian is in the sitting room, papers scattered across the table and writing into what Lena recognizes as their company’s accountant book.

“Mother?” she asks, and Lillian looks up. She raises an eyebrow at her daughter’s unexpected change of wardrobe.

“The clasp of my new pair of shoes came off, the one that father bought me when we were running errands for their departure.” Lena almost tears up, the realization what she has just done sinking in. It’s not that her family cannot afford a new pair of shoes. It’s the fact that the pair does remind her of Lionel.

She bites her lip. “You know how I wish to wear them to church on Sunday. I will hurry to the shoemaker that made the weatherproof boots for Lex, since their service was quick and excellent.” Lena realizes she has worn these shoes exclusively with her Sunday’s best for the last few weeks, and it does not help the regret that is already forming in the back of her mind.

Lillian puts the fountainpen down. “Very well. I expect you back for lunch time. And afterwards you will help me choose the china for the Smith’s visit after church on Sunday.”

“Yes, mother.” Lena looks down. Before she turns to go, she cannot help but wonder.

“Why are you not upstairs in father’s study?”

“Oh, you know how Lionel is.” Lillian shrugs. “He does not want anyone in there without his supervision. Not even when he is digging up dirt in Alaska. And that is true for you too, young lady, even if he has made exceptions for you before. Benoit agrees that it is inadequate for a young lady like yourself to be snooping about in his economics and politics books.”

Lena scoffs at the mention of her fiancé. “I was studying. Why would it be so bad for a woman to know about politics? I do not wish to write poetry, mother, I long to grasp the newspaper articles of the pros and cons of the gold standard that they talk about! Besides, you are overseeing the accounting in their absence. What is the difference?”

Lillian crosses her arms. “The difference is that I am only fulfilling this role in their absence. I do not strive to do anything that goes outside of my role as a mother and wife. You, on the other hand-“

“Goodbye, mother.” Lena says sharply and turns on her heel.

She rushes through the hallway and lets the front door close behind her with a loud thud. She startles a gardener who is working in the flower beds, but she pays him no mind. She has had this conversation with her mother too many times to count. She is sick of hearing it even in Benoit’s absence. She feels confined in her house, she longs to see Kara and she ruined her favorite pair of shoes because of it.

She walks with quick steps. Small puddles have formed on the sidewalks, and there are but a few people on the streets. The rain has mostly stopped, safe for a small drizzle that coats her hat and jacket. It is only when she almost reaches Harbor Road that she realizes she is crying. She stops and takes a deep breath to collect herself. She wipes the tears away with her handkerchief, then approaches Danvers Footwear.

Inside the shop, her eyes need a moment to adjust, just like the first time she came here. This time, however, it is because the rain has kept daylight from filtering in through the window, and there is only a small gas lamp in the room, failing to illuminate the entire workshop. Alexandra Danvers is sitting in the same spot she did when Lena came here with Lex.

“Miss Luthor?” she asks and steps closer.

“Yes. I, uh …” Lena finds herself at a loss for words. Her eyes dart around the room, but Kara is nowhere to be seen.

She hastily unpacks her shoes. “Oh, I am such a klutz. The clasp of my favorite pair of Sunday shoes came off. Would you take a look at it and let me know if it is repairable?”

“Oh. Of course, Miss Luthor.” Alexandra takes the pair and moves toward the corner with the lamp to inspect them. “Oh, I see. This should be doable. I will see if I can glue it back on or if I have to replace the strap entirely. This will be done by tomorrow mid-day.”

She emerges and gives Lena an encouraging smile. Lena lets out a breath of relief. At least she did not ruin the pair for good. Alexandra goes behind the counter to put the order into the register, then scribbles something onto a piece of paper.

“That would be 45 cents, then.”

Lena fishes out a dollar bill from her wallet and puts it on the counter. “You may keep the change.”

Alexandra’s eyes narrow. “Miss Luthor, that is more than double the amount it costs to-“

“I insist.” Lena says and avoids her gaze. Alexandra accepts with a huff.

“Please, if you do not mind to tell me,” she starts before she can think about it, “is Kara around today?”

Alexandra raises an eyebrow and gives Lena a quick look-over before she clears her throat. “Kara went out for errands when it stopped raining. I do not know when she will be back. Should I give her a message?”

Lena bites the inside of her cheek to keep her tears of frustration inside. “No, it is alright. Thank you. I will see you tomorrow.”

She ducks her head and turns to go, clutching her bag in her hands. She opens the door and is ready to make a run for it when she collides with someone.

“Oh!” A surprised voice yelps, and Lena feels a strong grip on her back.

She looks up only to stare into blue eyes that are wide open in surprise. Kara. Lena hastily detaches herself, smoothing her skirt.

“Lena.” Kara says after a moment. Her voice is just as soft as Lena remembered. “What brings you here?”

Lena looks down onto the floor. She came here to see Kara, and now that she is standing in front of her, she realizes she had no further plan. How foolish of her, to simply give into the impulse to want to be near Kara. She looks up to find Kara give her a questioning look. She gulps.

“I, uh. A pair of my shoes needed repair. I should get home before it starts to rain again.”

Kara looks at her for another long moment, then bites her lip. “If you can spare the time, would you like to come inside?”

The offer is so unexpected, Lena declines it before she has fully processed its meaning. “I, uh. I need to be home in time for lunch.”

Kara’s face falls, and Lena wants to take it back immediately. What a fool she is. But now that she has declined, she feels she cannot change her mind again so suddenly. Surely Kara would take her for a fool, if she does not do so already.

“I see. It was nice to see you, nevertheless,” Kara says and gives her a warm smile.

Lena nods. She wants to speak, but they are being interrupted by Alexandra.

“Kara! Is that you?”

“Yes, Alex. I’m talking to Lena.”

Alexandra only lets out a hum in response. It is not the first time that Lena has heard Kara refer to her sister as ‘Alex’, and she finds it most unusual. Alex is a boy’s name, after all. It is yet another detail that intrigues Lena about the sisters.

“I should go,” she announces, and it causes Kara to jump slightly.

“Of course. I wouldn’t want to keep you. I will see you around?” Kara sounds hopeful.

“Yes. I will pick up the shoes tomorrow.”

Kara smiles again. Lena soaks it up like sunshine, a flutter in her chest. They stare at each other for a moment before Lena remembers where she is.

“Have a good day, Kara,” she says in a haste, then walks past Kara without looking back.

She almost runs back home, and it starts to rain shortly before she reaches her street. She curses under her breath, not only at the untimely weather, but mostly at herself. She had made a fool out of herself today.

She spends the rest of the day sitting in her chamber, watching the rain hit the window. She tries but fails not to think about the way Kara’s hand had felt on her back and the way her blue eyes had bored into her very soul. Seeing Kara again, as it turns out, has only poured fuel into the fire of Lena’s strange inner turmoil.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you to everyone who has left kudos and comments so far! <3  
> feel free to come talk to me on [tumblr](http://hat-full-of-stars.tumblr.com)!


	3. Chapter 3

_1897_

When Kara comes home, the house is still quiet. It’s a stark contrast to the chaos the city has become around them, and she cannot help but chuckle a little bit. She puts the newspaper on the kitchen table and is about to make her way upstairs to wake Alex when Eliza calls out to her.

“Kara, is that you?”

“Yes, I’m in the kitchen.”

Eliza comes in and gives her a warm smile. “Good morning. I heard you leaving. What’s all the commotion on the street about?”

“They found gold, Eliza!” Kara exclaims, louder than she intended, and she points to the paper.

Eliza’s eyes narrow. “Who? Gold?” She picks up the paper, and her eyes grow wider by the second.

“Oh my! And you saw them disembark? How did you know the ship was coming at all? Oh! Lena’s father must have been among the men! Did she tell you they were arriving?”

Kara puts up a hand, and tells Eliza of her morning as calmly as she can. “I saw the Luthors disembarking, but I couldn’t find Lena among the crowd. There were so many people, I’ve never seen anything like it!”

“Good heavens, to think of the riches these men now possess! To think they might spend it here in the city, we desperately need it!” Eliza is still holding the paper, gazing back and forth between the headline and Kara as if the print might disappear any moment.

The kitchen door creaks open and Alex walks in, struggling to fully open her eyes.

“Mornin’. What’s this about? I saw half a dozen horse carriages rushing down the road from the window in our chamber. ‘s not a war, right?”

This time it’s Eliza who exclaims “Gold, Alex! They brought gold to the city!” with such enthusiasm that Alex winces. Kara recalls what she saw earlier for the second time while Eliza brews them tea, and the sisters get into a heated discussion about the new riches of these men.

“What do the Luthors need more money for? It’s people like us who need a damn miracle!” Alex scoffs and rubs her temples. She pushes the paper towards Kara, who is sitting on the other end of the table.

Kara boldly puts her hand onto the table. “That is true, but did you not read? Most of these men are ordinary folk who have been digging for gold in Alaska for years! The Luthors simply were lucky to be in the Yukon when they heard of the find in the Klondike. Lena has always said she thinks it silly they went looking for gold! But imagine, any ordinary person could go up North, stake a claim and become rich! I admit I fear the cold and the wilderness, but would that not also be a great adventure?”

“No, Kara,” Alex groans as she takes a sip of the tea Lena had given them the previous day. “Any ordinary _man_ could go up North, provided he has the clothing and the money for the ship! They stick up their noses at women manufacturing _shoes_ , how do you think they would find a woman looking for _gold_?”

“There was a woman with a sack of gold on the MS Portland this morning, I saw her with my own eyes-“ Kara starts, but Eliza interrupts them.

“Now, you two. Be nice to each other. Neither of us possess any of the gold, so why argue about it?”

Neither Alex nor Kara have a good retort, so they simply glare at each other and sag their shoulders. Eventually, they calm down, and the three eat their sparse breakfast over regular conversation, the paper stuffed into a drawer in the kitchen cabinet.

An hour before their shop opens, there is a banging on the front door, the shouts of several men coming in. Kara is laundering a set of their work clothes in the kitchen, the warm water reaching until her elbows, drops of sweat running down her brows. Eliza has already left for her morning shift at the hospital. Alex goes to open the door, and Kara quickly dries her hands on a towel to follow her.

“You make shoes here?” A man with a graying beard asks as soon as Alex steps outside, foregoing a greeting.

The dust of the road makes Kara cough as it comes inside. “We open at 10 on Saturdays,” Alex says with as much politeness as she can muster.

“I ain’t got much time, I need to be on the ship to the Klondike at 4! I need a pair of proper shoes, all the shoes in the shops downtown have sold out!” The man exclaims, and Alex and Kara both gape in surprise.

Kara almost wants to ask him to elaborate when he adds, “So, you make shoes here or no?”

Alex nods and quietly opens the door to let him in, and walks behind the register. Kara turns on the gas lamp in the corner, and two other men trail behind the man with the beard. Alex takes their orders and pre-payments, and once they have left, presumably to run other errands, the sisters scramble to retrieve materials they haven’t used in a while from various boxes, drawers and shelves.

“We are short on leather samples and thread,” Alex says once they start on the first pair. “I should have kept better inventory, damn.”

Kara looks up from cutting soles to the requested shoe sizes. “Nah, it’s not your fault, Alex. We hadn’t the money to keep up with it, anyways.”

Alex only hums in response. They work in silence for a while, if the ever-increasing noise of the commotion outside can count as such. From the small front window, they can see people and horses passing by in a hurry. Kara usually likes living close to the harbor, but today she finds it rather bothersome. Her thought keeps wandering back to Lena and what she might be doing at this moment.

They are about to finish the third pair of shoes, about twenty minutes before the men come back to pick them up, when there is another knock on the door. Alex asks them to come in, and then another group of four men are standing in their shop, eyes squinting in the dim light.

“You make shoes here?”

Alex and Kara exchange a look. “They won’t be done until the 4 o’clock ship, I’m afraid.” Alex says and gets up.

The man in the front shakes his head. “Oh, we are leaving on the 7 o’clock ship tomorrow morning! We need a pair each. Everything is sold out in the city.”

Kara stares at them. “How many … how many ships are heading for Alaska?”

“Haven’t you heard?” the man says in surprise. “Gold! They found gold in the Klondike! More gold than these miners carried with them on the MS Portland! Hundreds are boarding the ships, many are said to come to Seattle in the next days! We need to leave soon to make it to the Yukon before the river freezes over!”

Kara gulps. Something about this sudden onset of change reminds her of the aftermath of the Great Fire. The town she had grown up in, her life, changing in an instant. The influx of people who rebuilt, and who stayed. And now, the arrival of gold, and with it the men and women looking to make a fortune. She shudders despite the warm, stuffy air of the shop.

Alex has walked behind the counter and is scribbling down their orders, and Kara snaps out of it and walks back to her workplace to polish the shoes before the first group of men comes back.

They end up working until well after sun-down, more men coming in each hour. When Eliza comes home, she helps them out despite her own feet aching. It’s more work than they have gotten in months, and when they close up for the night Alex has a smile on her face despite looking more exhausted than Kara has seen her in years.

“I take back what I said about the gold this morning,” she says and grins as she swipes up strips of materials that have fallen to the ground. “I could get used to the squeaks and creaks of the register in my ear all day.”

Kara laughs, despite the slight unease not having left her chest all day. She’s grateful for the work and the money, but overwhelmed at the same time. And she still has no clue about Lena.

Eliza smiles at them. “We will certainly eat a nice dinner once we find the time.”

***

When Kara goes to lock the front door of the shop, she can see light coming from Winn’s shop across the street. She squints, thinking it strange that it would be open so late. She locks the door and heads back inside where Eliza has started to prepare dinner.

“I will quickly go to Winn’s. I won’t be long,” she announces, then leaves out of the backdoor.

When she turns back onto Harbor Road, there are still a few men rushing down towards the harbor, a most unusual sight if it were any other day. Kara spares a brief thought to the fact that she’s in her dirty work clothes still, then shrugs and crosses the street.

The chalkboard in front of Winn’s shop is lying on the sidewalk, seemingly knocked over by passersby. Kara frowns and picks it up, then looks into the shop. The gas lamp by the counter is casting a dim light, but her friend is nowhere to be seen.

She opens the door tentatively, finding it unlocked. “Winn? Are you there?”

“Kara?” Winn’s voice comes from somewhere close to her, and she jumps in surprise.

She follows it, and when she sees Winn sitting on the floor behind the counter, she gasps and rushes towards him in an instant.

“Winn, good heavens, are you alright? Was there a robbery? What happened?” She kneels down next to him.

Winn looks up to her, but his familiar face is overcome with sadness. There is no trace of the usual mischief in his eyes.

He lets out a low laugh. “My father. He left. He heard of the gold, packed his things and boarded the steamer at 4 o’clock! I’ve never seen him like this!”

Kara’s chest tightens. She wonders just how many men had boarded the first ship on a whim, leaving behind their businesses and families, all because they were captivated by the chance of finding gold.

“I’m sorry, Winn. He did not wish for you to come with him?”

“No,” Winn says and sighs. “He told me to run the shop in his absence, that he will come back as a rich man in a year! The man has lost his mind, he has fifty dollars to his name and no equipment! Does he think the gold just flows down the rivers in the Yukon and all he has to do is hold out a cup to collect it?”

Winn suddenly pushes himself up and gestures around the shop. Kara stands up too and follows his gaze. “Look at all this! All these people coming into the city, and none of them looking to buy anything I sell! Who needs board games when you can go up North and have an adventure of your own?”

Kara bites her lip, having no good of an answer. Her friend is right. While she and Alex had been busy all day, taking orders left and right, Winn had been here all alone, no one bothering to pay his shop a visit.

“I’m sorry, Winn,” she repeats, putting a hand on his shoulder.

Winn turns towards her and lets out a deep sigh. “How was your day, then? The street was so crowded today.”

Kara gives him a brief rundown of her day, starting when she saw the miners leave the ship. Winn listens with intent, and when he hears that the Danvers have made more money in one day than in many previous weeks, he smiles. “At least, this is good news. I’m glad. You’re lucky that you make just what the miners need.”

“You could, too” Kara says then, an idea coming to her mind.

Winn frowns. “I make wooden steam locomotives and ships, Kara. As I said, nobody buys them when they have the chance to hop onto the real thing.”

“No, I mean. You’re savvy, Winn. You can make something the prospective miners need. You knit me a pullover for Hanukkah a few years ago.”

“Was that the winter you came to our house and drunkenly knocked over the Christmas tree my father had just put up?” Winn asks, and a grin forms on his face.

Kara is so relieved to see the familiar expression that for a moment she glosses over the fact that Winn is deflecting. “I have no memory of that particular night.”

They share a laugh, but then Winn stares at his feet. “I don’t know if I’m any good at it, Kara. I only knit for myself, my father and perhaps you and Alex. I don’t know if people would want to spend money on it. My father told me to look after the shop and-“

“Winn” Kara cuts him off. “Does your father know if he’s any good at gold mining? Do any of the men and women boarding the ships know anything about where they’re going at all? Your father left you to fend for yourself, you needn’t spare him a second thought!”

Winn is quiet, and Kara fears she has misspoken, but then he smiles. “You’re right, Kara. I’m sorry. What do you think? You make shoes, I knit socks and pullovers?”

Kara smiles back at him. “I think that’s fantastic. We could even make a special deal, sell our mining boots and your socks together. I will consult with Alex.”

“Now, I do have to make the socks first, but I think that’s agreeable. I should have enough wool left for a dozen or so pairs.” Winn’s eyes glint with enthusiasm.

“We might not go up North and mine for gold, but we will use the opportunity for our business. How many more people do you think will come in the next days? Or weeks? Imagine! Having steady business for weeks! It would feel like we’re in New York City!”

Kara laughs. “Let’s not get too far ahead of ourselves. Let’s think until tomorrow, and both go to sleep. Stop by tomorrow evening?”

Winn nods with a smile, and they hug. Kara feels relief flood through her body.

Winn has been her best friend since childhood, and seeing him discouraged and alone is something she truly wishes she’d never have to. She feels angry at his father for leaving him behind, and it makes the craze of the day seem that much more absurd. It’s as if the whole city has been bewitched by the promise of gold, and it’s only the start.

When she leaves, she feels calmer than before, and yet the slight feeling of unease in her chest does not seem to want to disappear just yet.

***

“I sure hope we can find someone agreeable quickly,” Alex says as they near the square in front of the city hall. “I’d rather not leave mother alone at the shop for too long.” She takes a deep breath as she looks around.

Kara places a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “She’ll be alright. She can handle the shop.” She follows Alex’ eyes across the crowd.

The square is full of people, men and women alike, holding up hastily scribbled signs reading _‘looking for work’_ , _‘experienced in stitching textiles’_ , and the like.

“Where do these people come from all of a sudden?” Kara wonders aloud. “The news must have spread quickly.”

After the onrush of aspiring goldminers onto not only their shop, but many in the city, Alex and Eliza had decided the previous night to hire someone to help them with the work. The number of assignments the previous day alone meant they would not be in a dire financial situation for a while, and they needed to keep up with the demand. Eliza had decided to help out at the counter until then.

Alex only shrugs. Kara narrows her eyes, trying to get a good look at the people in the crowd. She wishes she could find Lena among them. She hasn’t seen her since Lena came to their shop the day before the ship’s arrival, and while she is aware that the Luthor family must be busy, she cannot help but worry. However, as expected, the crowd is a sea of bowler hats and colorless coats with no glimpse of Lena’s dark hair or one of her fashionable jackets.

Alex takes Kara’s arm and motions for her to follow. They approach a man at random, an elderly worker with a pipe between his lips.

“We offer work.” Alex says, foregoing a greeting.

The man’s eyes go wide and he eyes them with interest. “What kind?”

“Footwear.”

“How much do you pay?” The man asks and takes a drag from his pipe.

Alex bites her lip before she answers. Kara can feel her hesitation. The wage had been a point of discussion between her and Eliza the night before. They hadn’t hired anyone in so long, not since before Jeremiah went missing, that they had no idea what amount was appropriate anymore. Not with the ongoing recession, and now the sudden find of gold.

“A dollar and ten cents a day.”

The man huffs. “Fair enough. Did your father send you?”

“No,” Alex says, and Kara suppresses a groan.

“I run the shop.” Alex adds with practiced nonchalance.

The man looks her up and down with a raised eyebrow, then erupts in laughter. “You? I will not have a woman tell me how to do my handiwork.”

Kara gives him a scowl, then takes Alex’ arm and drags her away before her sister can start an argument. “Let’s go, and not waste our time on him.” Alex sighs, but lets herself be led away.

To their dismay, every encounter after that goes the same or a similar way. They had been foolish to hope the workers would not care who employed them. Now with the sudden excess of work, the men seem to be reluctant to accept an offer from a woman’s business.

After an hour, Alex leans on the wall next to a shop entrance, exhausted and angry. Kara stands next to her, keeping silent. No words she could utter at this moment would ease Alex’ anger and worry. It is not only the fact that people do not want to work for them. It is that this would not be an issue if Jeremiah was still there. It is the painful reminder of his absence. It is that this is not the life either of them had envisioned for themselves when they were younger. It is that despite that, they could never give up the shop, give up their one constant reminder of their father.

Kara swallows thickly as she watches a single tear roll down Alex’ cheek, but Alex is quick to wipe it away with her sleeve. She wants to speak up, then, encourage her sister, when a voice interrupts them.

“Excuse me.”

Kara looks down to find a young native boy standing in front of them. He is wearing trousers and a striped shirt, but his hair is long and braided in the traditional way.

“I saw you. You walk around, offer work.” His voice is quiet and timid.

Alex’ expression softens. “We do.”

“I can work,” the boy says and stretches out his hands as if to demonstrate they are intact.

Alex smiles at him. “What is your name?”

“Call me Charlie.” His eyes are wide now, and he looks between Alex and Kara with curiosity.

“Charlie, I’m Alex and this is my sister Kara.” Kara nods along, and Charlie smiles for the first time.

“How old are you, Charlie?”

He tilts his head. “Twelve winters.”

Alex lets out a long-drawn breath, and looks over to Kara. Kara bites the insides of her cheeks. She finds the boy endearing, and he is clearly looking for any sort of work. She wonders where his family is.

“You want to hire him?” Kara whispers, even if the effort is fruitless with Charlie standing right in front of them.

“Why not? He speaks English, he needs work, he is healthy.” Alex lifts her chin.

Kara shrugs. “Agreed, then.”

“Charlie, can you come to Danvers Footwear on Harbor Road after lunchtime today? We offer one dollar and ten cent per day, and you can start today.” Alex turns to Charlie and explains. “There is much work. We make and repair shoes.”

She looks like she wants to say more, but stops short when she sees the panicked expression on the boy’s face. Tears start filling in his eyes, and he bites his lip.

“What’s wrong? Do you not wish to work as a shoemaker?” Concern is apparent in her voice.

Charlie swallows. Alex places a hand on his shoulder, and to Kara’s surprise, her lets her.

“I can’t read.”

Kara’s heart sinks. Their shop is one of many rundown houses on Harbor Road, and the faded paint identifying it as ‘Danvers Footwear’ has certainly not caught anyone’s eyes in years, either. Alex hums and looks over to Kara for help.

“Alright,” Kara says, making an effort to sound chipper, “then do you want to come with us? We can show you where the shop is, and you can come there alone after lunchtime.”

She hears Alex breathe a sigh of relief. Charlie nods. “Alright.”

“Wait, Charlie, where do you live?” Alex asks as Kara is already turning to leave.

Charlie points a finger to the door they’re standing in front of. “Here!”

Alex turns around and for the first time notices the stairwell next to the shop entrance, leading to a second floor. _‘Boarding House, tenant F. Jackson’_ a sign reads on the wall. And underneath a handwritten note: _‘no rooms available’_.

“Miss Jackson!” Charlie says with a smile on his face when Alex turns back towards him again.

“Alright,” Alex says.

Kara wonders if Alex is thinking the same thing. A young native boy living by himself in the city, seemingly not enrolled in school. It’s not unheard of, but it makes her worry for the boy she barely knows. She wonders where his family is, if he has a family at all. Her heart tightens in her chest, the experience, if shared, an all too familiar one.

“Let’s go, then” she says and walks forward, leaving Alex and Charlie to trail behind.

The shop is as busy as they left it this morning, and Eliza’s face lights up when she sees them come in. Then, however, her brows furrow in confusion when she sees Charlie.

Charlie stands in the shop, taking everything in with wide eyes. What was an empty worktable two days ago is filled with materials, half-finished shoes and paper strips pinned to shoes bearing the names of the respective customers. Half a dozen men are standing in line, leaving the front door open, and the dust of the street mixes with the dust of the shop. Alex and Kara make their way behind the counter, and Eliza politely asks the customer she had been talking to for a minute.

“Alex, Kara,” she whispers. “That is a child.”

Alex rubs her temple and gives her mother a rundown of their morning. By the end, Eliza sighs and takes another look at Charlie. “Very well, then. Introduce me to him.”

Kara attends to the waiting customer in Eliza’s stead, inspecting the shoes he had put on the counter. With one ear, she listens on Eliza’s conversation with Charlie.

“I’m Eliza, thank you for agreeing to help us out. Have you worked at a shoemaker before?”

Charlie shyly shakes his head, and it makes Kara smile.

“Where did you work before, Charlie?”

Charlie tilts his head in thought, then seems to understand the question. “Shop on second avenue, delivery. This morning, the owner went on a ship to look for gold.”

Kara’s eyes go wide, and she suppresses a gasp. She tries to focus on the customer, scribbling his receipt. She hands it to him and thanks him, wishing him a nice day. The drawer of the register is unusually heavy with coins, a sensation Kara hasn’t felt in years. She glances over to the others before she starts with the next man in line.

“Oh, I hear that is happening now all over the city. So many new people coming here to board ships, so many people coming from the villages for work. You’re lucky you met Alex and Kara, then.” Eliza gives Charlie a warm smile.

Charlie nods.

“You can start in the afternoon. Do you have somewhere to each lunch or do you want to eat with us?” Eliza’s offer is unexpected to Kara, but it doesn’t surprise her. Just two days ago they had been worried about their groceries, now they could afford to even feed a fourth mouth.

Charlie, however, shakes his head. “I eat at the boarding house. I tell Miss Jackson about work.”

Eliza nods in understanding, and Kara feels relieved when she hears it, too. He seems to have at least one person looking out for him, after all. Charlie leaves after Alex makes sure he knows how to get back from the boarding house, and the rest of the morning passes in a blur.

When they close the shop for the lunch hour, Kara feels exhausted and sweaty. At the same time, seeing the stack of paper on the shelf beneath the counter fills her with an excitement for perhaps the first time since she started helping out at the shop, back when Jeremiah was still with them.

Eliza goes out and buys them sandwiches for lunch from the bakery two streets away. When Kara bites into the freshly baked bread and the slice of beef, she wants to cry from how good it tastes. A cup of the steaming tea Lena brought over two days before sits next to her on the table, and she can see Alex eat her lunch in silent appreciation as well.

“I will rest for a while, will you wake me up when you open the shop?” Eliza asks when they finish, and Alex and Kara nod.

They remain in the kitchen, talking over their cups of tea and resting their tired feet. The constant commotion outside of the house has become background noise already. The shouting of carriers, the tromping of hooves and screeching of wheels down the street.

Alex is reading the morning paper, humming to herself as she scans the pages. Kara takes a glimpse at the headlines. _‘Stacks of yellow metal!’_ , one reads in bold letters. She shivers, remembering the morning the day before. She feels restless all of a sudden. Swirling her tea in her cup, she thinks of Lena. She still hasn’t heard from her.

“It says here that Benoit Bourg, Lex Luthor’s business partner in Luthor Luxury Imports, took a suite at the Grande Hotel with his fiancée upon his return to Seattle to recover from the stresses and strains of his journey.” Alex says as if reading her thoughts.

Kara nearly chokes on air. She tries not to imagine Lena with her fiancé. “I wonder when I can see her again,” she says instead and swallows thickly.

“Kara,” Alex begins and puts the paper down. “You and Lena have enjoyed many freedoms over the last year. But now her family is back, and she is bound by them. I am begging of you to focus on our work, and not to let her distract you any longer.”

“No!” Kara shouts, louder than intended, and jumps up from her chair. Alex gives her a sharp look that says ‘mother is sleeping upstairs’, but Kara doesn’t care.

Alex has never been fond of Lena, and it had been fine. But there is so much that Alex doesn’t know about Lena, about them. So much that Kara cannot tell anyone. Not even her sister.

“You don’t know, Alex.” Kara says more quietly, and tears spring into her eyes. “You don’t know what she means to me. What we mean to each other.”

“So tell me.” Alex raises an eyebrow in challenge.

Kara gulps and grips the backrest of her chair. “I can’t.”

“Kara, I can see that you and Lena have a special bond. And while I may not know much about her, or about what the two of you have shared, please understand that I am only trying to protect you. She has a fiancé who has now returned. How could she ever choose a shoemaker’s daughter from Seattle over a rich businessman from Paris? What do you think you are going to do?” Alex’ voice has softened, and there is a pleading tone to it.

“Please, Kara. There is nothing you can do.”

Kara takes a deep breath, willing herself not to cry. She stares at her sister, her words echoing in her mind. She cannot help but wonder if Alex knows, after all. If she knows just how much Lena means to her. If she knows of the proximity they’ve shared.

“What about how you treated her each time she came over?” Kara hears herself asking, and a tear rolls down her cheek. “She only wanted us to eat well, to give away some of what she takes for granted every day. Why did you never warm up to her, when all she wanted was for you to be friendly to her? You never approved of her being in my life, regardless of whether the men in her family were in the city or not.”

Alex swallows. She has tears in her eyes now, too. “I’m sorry, Kara. But there is … seeing you two has been a constant reminder of Kelly and I … I am happy that you have a friend in Lena. I know it is wrong of me to judge her based on her family … but I beg of you, do not destroy yourself for her sake. Her fiancé is back, and she will go on to live without you.”

Kara is silent for a moment, staring at her sister. She hasn’t heard Alex utter Kelly’s name in a while, and the similarity of their situation suddenly becomes all too clear. Alex’ friend had gotten married and moved away, and there had been nothing Alex could do. But then again, Kara’s bond with Lena is different from that of Alex and Kelly, she is sure of it. Yet, she cannot tell her sister that.

Before she can speak, a knocking on the shop’s door interrupts them.

“That must be Charlie,” Alex says and jumps to her feet.

Kara feels like Alex is grateful for the interruption, but she silently follows her sister into the front. Alex spends the afternoon introducing Charlie to the workings of their shop while Eliza and Kara do their best to keep up with the long line of customers. The mood between Alex and Kara remains charged, however, and Eliza glances between them with furrowed brows from time to time. She says nothing however, and by the time the shop closes all three of them are too tired to discuss the matter.


	4. Chapter 4

_1896_

The next day, Lena is still in a daze. She spends the morning and early afternoon in her chamber, switching between reading magazine articles and daydreaming about Kara. She stares at herself in the looking glass and braids her hair. She feels restless in her anticipation of going to the shoemaker and picking up her repaired shoes. She lets out a sigh as she adjusts her hairpins. It is of no use. Kara is on her mind, and seeing her again the day before has done nothing to quell the curiosity inside of her. If anything, going there had only fueled the fire. Maybe if she puts off going long enough, Alexandra will be alone at the shop again, and then Lena will take her shoes and make a quick exit.

There’s a knock on her door. “Miss Luthor.”

“Yes, Eve?” Lena turns around in her chair, expecting the maid to open the door. Eve, however, makes no move to do so.

“There is a delivery for you at the front door. I wanted to accept it, but the delivery person insisted on handing it over to you personally.”

Lena tilts her head. She tries to remember if she placed an order at a shop recently, but draws a blank. Then her eyes go wide. It couldn’t possibly-

She’s up and hasting down the staircase in a flash, almost slamming the door into poor Eve’s face. Her maid looks after her in bewilderment, but then only shrugs and walks down the hallway to go back to the task she had been attending to.

Kara is standing on the front porch, smiling widely, and holding out a small cardboard box.

“Kara …” Lena wishes she was more articulate in this moment, but the words have escaped her altogether.

Kara is not wearing her peculiar mix of menswear and sportswear this time around, either. Lena recognizes the same blouse she had worn at Winn’s shop the other week. She is without a jacket, however, and the sleeves of her blouse are rolled up to reveal her muscular arms. Her hair is in a tidier updo this time.

Lena clears her throat to keep herself from staring. “Excuse me. I was not expecting you. I was just preparing to pay a visit to your workshop.”

“Well, then I am glad I forestalled you.” Kara’s wide smile never falters. “Here are your shoes.”

Lena nods and takes the box. “Thank you.”

She briefly wonders how Kara knows where she lives, but then reminds herself that this is not New York City. The number of upper-class mansions is fairly limited, and the Luthors are part of the fairly limited number of families living in them. Lena looks down at her feet, suddenly overcome with nerves.

“Would you like to walk with me?” Kara’s question makes her look up.

“What?” she asks, then scolds herself immediately. She had heard the question clear as day, only her brain seemed to not catch up to its meaning.

Kara smiles again. Her eyes crinkle, and in the bright sunlight of her front porch Lena can make out tiny freckles on her nose. Lena almost misses the second time Kara asks, “Would you like to take a walk with me, up the hill?”

“Oh.” Lena needs another moment to process. Kara wants to spend time with her. Her first instinct is to decline, to give a false pretense of business, but then she imagines being the reason for Kara’s smile faltering, and there is no going back.

“I would enjoy that very much, yes.” She gives Kara a timid smile of her own.

Kara’s smile seems to grow impossibly wider. Lena fumbles with the fabric of her skirt. “Would you mind waiting across the street? I will only be a minute.”

Kara nods in understanding, and Lena watches as she turns around to walk ahead. She turns around when she hears footsteps behind her in the corridor. Eve is standing there.

“Eve, goodness. My repaired shoes were just brought. What a relief!” Lena puts the cardboard box onto the highboy.

“I will take a short walk, would you notify mother in case I am not back upon her return?” she asks as she changes from her house shoes into her sandals and takes her jacket from the hanger.

Eve looks back at her with narrowed eyes, as if she wants to ask Lena something but does not dare speak. “Of course, Miss Luthor. You do not wish company?”

“No, I will be fine by myself.” Lena has always been a terrible liar, and it must show on her face. But Eve only nods and then disappears behind one of the many doors leading into the heart of the house.

Lena doesn’t linger. She puts on the first hat she grabs, but decides against a parasol. For some reason, she would feel laughable taking it on a walk with Kara. When she steps out onto the front porch and gazes across the street, Kara is nowhere to be seen. Her heart sinks before she spots her up the street on the next intersection. She walks over in a haste.

Kara acknowledges her with a nod, then starts walking north. Lena walks next to her in companionable silence despite the abundance of questions overflowing in her mind. Kara seems in no rush to talk. She does, however, walk with a kind of swiftness and stalwartness Lena rarely sees her own people using. It is certainly different from the leisurely Sunday stroll that her father used to take them on when she was a child.

It becomes evident that Kara knows even this part of town like the back of her hand. She doesn’t stop to look around to reassure herself where they are going. They only stop to let carriages pass, and Lena can’t help but wonder what they might look like to passersby. It is more likely, however, that they are unnoticed in their normalcy. Kara is wearing ordinary clothing, a far cry from her work attire. When Lena realizes this, it calms her nerves, and she stops looking over her shoulder at every chance.

Gradually, the houses become less as they reach the outskirts of the city. The road becomes uphill, and Lena does her best not to let it show that she is out of breath already. Kara slows her pace the greener their surroundings become, and eventually they are on a gravel road that leads into the woods. Lena looks around, having never been at this particular place. There is a farmhouse visible between fields in the near distance just next to the woods, and she hears the tell-tale rush of a stream, but she cannot see any water.

Her eyes are wide as she looks to Kara.

“Please excuse my haste. I was unsure if you wanted to be seen with me,” Kara says and rubs her neck.

Lena bites her lip. She wants to deny it, but Kara’s words have truth in them. Especially since her mother had been on errands in the city. “It is alright. I have never been here before.”

“It’s an enjoyable place, especially in the summer when the city is hot and bustling, the shade of the trees is quiet and cool.” Kara smiles. “Shall we go?”

Lena nods, and they keep walking. Kara’s step is much more leisurely now. Before she can think twice, Lena speaks what has been on her mind.

“The blouse and updo suit you well.” She turns to her head to gauge Kara’s reaction.

To her surprise, the blonde blushes. “Thank you,” she murmurs so quietly Lena almost doesn’t hear it.

The reach a clearing. People must have cut lumber here in the city’s early days, Lena thinks as she looks around. The sky is blue, and seems clearer than downhill in the city with its smoking chimneys and factories.

Kara rests her foot on a nearby stump, and before Lena can ask her what she is doing, Kara has rid her feet of her sandals and is taking her skirt in her hands. She laughs loudly and starts running across the meadow.

Lena’s heart skips a beat. She watches as Kara spins in circles like a child and angles her face towards the sun. Her laughter rings sweet in Lena’s ears, and all Lena can do is watch her, spellbound.

Kara turns to look back to Lena. “Lena! Join me!” Her grin is wide.

Lena hesitates, but she eventually starts walking to the middle of the clearing where Kara is. The sun is warm on her face. Lena stops in front of Kara, but Kara reaches out a hand with an expectant look on her face. Lena takes it, only then realizing that she forgot to put on gloves. She blushes in embarrassment as Kara’s hand closes around hers. The touch is soft and warm, and Kara pulls her towards herself, then spins around again and lifts her arm over her head. Lena goes along and spins in a circle, tiptoeing along with the movement. She lets out a chuckle at the silliness of it.

Kara gently lets her hand down and when Lena faces her again, her smile seems to outshine the sun. Lena smiles back, biting her lip as another chuckle threatens to escape. They look at each other for a moment before Kara seems to have another idea.

“I want to show you something.” She lightly tugs at Lena’s arm, gesturing for her to follow before she turns around and walks back to where they came from.

Lena can only nod and follow. Her head still spins from Kara’s shenanigans, but there’s something else, too. Lena has never had many friends, not since moving here, and not back in New York. She was usually forced to spend time with the daughters of her parents’ acquaintances, their conversations as stiff and forced as the starched tablecloths. Here she has Sam, but her friend’s path of life is obscure to her at best, the several years between them a significant gap. They usually meet for tea and pastries.

With Kara, it’s different, she knows this much at once. She feels at ease. Lena usually likes to spend her time alone, a habit born out of necessity in a household that has never made her feel welcome. It’s her alone time that makes her feel at ease, free from the perceptions forced upon her by a world she never agreed to be a part of.

But Kara, with a single touch of her hand and spin of her arm, has unraveled a thread Lena has been tightening around her heart for most of her life. And Kara, who is putting her sandals back on by the tree stump, seems to be completely unaware of it.

They follow the path further into the woods. The bushes are green and lush from the rain the previous day, and Lena listens carefully to the birdsong. A woodpecker can be heard in the distance. Gradually, the sound of water seems to be getting closer until Kara points excitedly at a stream a few yards away. They approach what looks like a small, make-shift resting spot at the side of the stream, a log that Kara takes a seat on with a familiar ease. Ferns are growing all around it, and a small bird that was sitting on the log flies away as Lena approaches to sit down next to Kara.

“This place is beautiful.” Lena looks around in awe.

Kara pushes a stray hair out of her face. “I’m happy you think so. Alex and I come here often in the summer to bathe in the stream.”

“Oh, really?” Lena is unable to hide the surprise in her voice. She has difficulty imagining herself bathing in an outside water, much less in the woods.

“Yes. It saves water at home. And it is much more fun, too.” Kara grins at her. She unclasps her sandals once more.

“The water is still cold, but we can go in with our feet.”

Before Lena can stop her, Kara is wading into the water. Lena bites her lip and follows her. It seems like all she can do today. The water near the edge is shallow, only reaching Kara’s ankles. Kara has her skirt cropped up in her hands, looking at Lena expectantly.

Lena gulps at takes another look at the water. It’s clear, the stream steady but slow. In the middle of the creek she can see the water being deeper. It must be where Kara bathes in the summer, she thinks. She shakes her head, willing the image of Kara undressed from her mind, and finally takes off her own shoes and socks.

The ground is hard and unfamiliar beneath her toes, her delicate feet used to soft carpet, unfamiliar with touching the soil. Yet, the sensation is freeing, bringing back at once images of herself playing on a field as a young child, unburdened while her mother watched. Lena feels herself tear up at the sudden memory.

She walks towards Kara, who once again stretches out her hand to help Lena into the water. With her free hand Lena crops up her skirt, and she lets out a surprised gasp when her feet break through the surface of the cold water. As soon as she stands firmly, however, the sensation becomes familiar and refreshing. Kara does not let go of her hand. They stand like that for a while, enjoying the quiet and each other’s presence.

“This is most pleasant,” Lena breaks the silence after a while.

Kara smiles at her. “I’m glad. I assume you do not spend much time in nature?”

“No,” Lena says and lets out a low laugh. “It is not in my family’s image.”

“That is a shame.”

Lena hums in response and wiggles her toes in the soft sand.

“Oh! Let me see if-“ Kara says and turns her head towards the bushes at the edge. She lets go of Lena’s hand and wades through the water, careful not to get her skirt wet.

Lena watches her pluck something from the bushes, then return. “Blackberries!” Kara says in excitement. “It’s still early in the season, the bushes will be full of them in two months. But here, have some early ones.” She stretches out her hand, the small fruits fresh and shiny in her palm.

Lena takes one in awe. “Thank you.” It’s a little sour, not yet as sweet as in midsummer, but Lena savors it nonetheless.

Kara gives Lena a shy glance, then eats a blackberry of her own. Lena cannot take her eyes off her. Kara seems so familiar in these surroundings.

Lena’s mind cannot help but drift to her brother, father and fiancé. She wonders how they are faring, three business men from the big cities of the world in the unexplored nature of the North. She shakes her head. She cannot worry about them now.

Kara catches her gaze, and smiles shyly. Lena feels heat creeping up her neck and averts her gaze. She draws lines into the sand underwater with the tip of her toe.

They stand there in companionable silence before Lena speaks up again. “Have you always lived in Seattle?”

“I have.” Kara nods. “Where did you live before you came here?”

Lena bites her lip. She is sure that Kara is only asking to be polite. Their company is advertised as being from New York in all the newspapers and the windows of the shops that sell the products they import. “New York City,” Lena says nonetheless.

“But you were born in Ireland?” Kara asks.

Lena’s heart skips a beat. Kara remembers their short conversation from Winn’s shop. “I was. The Luthors adopted me when I was four.” She hesitates. “After … after my mother died.”

“I’m sorry.” Kara looks up and their eyes meet again. Her expression is genuine, unlike the fitted pity Lena is used to receiving. Kara doesn’t add any ‘but you should be grateful you have such a better life here’ or ‘do you remember her?’, and for that Lena is thankful. Kara simply stretches out her hand to offer Lena another blackberry, and Lena accepts it with a bashful smile.

“I am adopted, too.”

Lena looks up in surprise, and she feels a rush of conflicting emotions rushing into her chest. Sorrow, for the loss that Kara appears to have suffered. Comfort, because she has never met another adoptee in all her 19 years of life. Curiosity, for now she wants to know all of Kara, everything that makes her, her.

“You are?” Lena can only hope that it encourages Kara to keep speaking.

“The Danvers adopted me when I was 14. They were friends of my parents, so I already knew Eliza and Jeremiah, and Alex.” Kara says and looks away from Lena and over the water of the creek. A solemn look spreads over her face, like she is looking at something in the past long gone. Lena decides not to ask more questions.

Kara shivers. “Do you want to get out of the water?”

Lena nods. They climb back onto the soil, and Lena bites her tongue not to spill profanities when leaves and soil stick to her feet and stain her handkerchief when she tries to wipe them off. Kara seems to have no such worries, having sat back down on the log and eating the rest of the berries. Lena sighs and sits down next to her.

“How are you planning on spending the rest of your day?” Kara asks into the quiet after a while.

“I’m afraid my day-to-day is quite boring. I have spent the last two days reading magazines my friend Jack sent me from London.” Lena omits the fact that she had also been thinking about Kara.

“What kind of magazines are they?”, Kara asks with interest. She tilts her head a little.

Lena blushes. She thinks of the article about the American dancer in Paris. “Fashion.” She is aware how terribly superficial it must sound to Kara.

“What about you?” she asks to redirect Kara’s attention.

“I’ve been reading as well. I have to go to the library to give back a book I wasn’t even supposed to be borrowing. But I’m good friends with James, the supervisor of the reading room, so he lets me borrow books that are meant for attendance only.” She grins mischievously, and Lena finds it endearing.

Lena laughs. “What book is it?”

“Oh, it’s a new one, a quite unusual story. The title is The Time Machine. It made me quite thoughtful. But I didn’t finish it yet, so it is a shame I must give it back already.”

Lena hums. She has not heard of the book, but it is no surprise to her. Lillian likes to remind her to ‘not lose herself in a world of fiction’ and read poetry instead. Lena hates poetry. She much prefers the newspaper, to keep herself educated on current affairs. Even if nobody ever bothers to ask for her opinion.

Their conversation continues for a while, and Lena tells Kara of the vast library she had visited in London during her family’s travels. Kara listens with wide-eyed interest, and in turn tells her about the books she has enjoyed reading in the past.

When they decide to leave, Lena is reluctant to part from Kara. Before they walk down the hill and back into the city, Kara takes Lena’s hand in hers. Kara’s hand is rough and calloused, yet still soft, and Lena once more becomes aware of the fact that she forgot to put on gloves when she left the house. Her cheeks burn a bright red.

“I had a most enjoyable time with you today, Lena. Thank you.” Kara’s smile is warm, and Lena’s heart beats so violently in her chest she is sure that Kara must hear it.

She finds herself unable to speak, and nods.

“I would like to walk with you again sometime, if you are free?” Kara asks hopefully.

Lena nods. “I would like that very much,” she croaks out.

When Kara smiles at her, Lena feels like the sun is shining just for her. She mourns the loss of Kara’s touch immediately when Kara lets go of her hand. When they part ways at an intersection close to Lena’s house, Lena stands there, looking after Kara’s retreating figure until she turns and walks home.

Eve eyes her with suspicion when she comes in, but Lena foregoes an explanation for her long absence and goes to her chamber. Kara is all that is on her mind for the rest of the week. She longs to see Kara again, and she fills her days with as much reading as she can to help time fly by.

***

Being friends with Sam, Lena has found over the past year, has introduced her to more family activities than she has ever experienced in all her years in the Luthor household. This occurs to her once again when she finds herself standing in Sam’s kitchen for the first time, met with her friend’s flabbergasted face.

“What do you mean you’ve never baked a pie before, Lena?”

Lena shrugs and looks down at the tiles of the floor. “I don’t know. Lillian insisted I learn how to arrange the cutlery and choose the best china for the occasion, but the baking and cooking has always been done by the chefs and the maids.”

“Well then, let’s change that!” Sam says and pulls on Lena’s sleeve. She grins widely.

Lena smiles. The ease with which Sam can just decide to do things never fails to amaze her. She is bound in many ways, but at least here, in her own house, her friend enjoys a kind of freedom Lena has never known. If Lena walked into the kitchen at the Luthor house and insisted on baking a pie her mother would drag her out by the ears, and the maids would gossip about it later.

Sam pulls up the sleeves of her tea gown and opens several cabinets, pulling out jars of sugar and flour. Lena watches her with great interest. Nevertheless, she feels awkward as she has no idea how to move around.

“Thank you, Sam. I appreciate it. But you really needn’t make such a fuss over me …” she crinkles out an imaginary wrinkle in her skirt.

“Nonsense,” Sam says without looking back at her. “I haven’t baked in so long. We shall have the pie with tea!”

Before Lena can reply, they hear the tell-tale thunder of a child’s footsteps on the wooden stairs. Sam’s daughter Ruby comes stumbling down, her face brightening when she sees Lena.

“You’re baking pie?” she exclaims as she rushes to engulf Lena in a hug.

Lena gasps at the impact and grasps the child’s arm, but hugs her back. Ruby reaches until her chin now, but she knows better than to tell her how much she has grown since she has last seen her.

“We just decided to bake one, yes sweetie,” Sam says and walks over to the icebox. She grabs two eggs and a container of milk, then turns around.

“Ruby, be a doll and empty out the drip pan for me?”

Ruby sighs and separates from Lena.

“And will you get the milk card from the drawer and paste it to the front door for the milk man? We will be out of milk after this.”

“Yes, ma,” Ruby nods and moves into action.

Sam reaches for a jar of canned cherries, then smiles at Lena. “Very well, shall we get started?” She hands Lena an apron, and Lena accepts it with a grateful smile.

As Sam explains to her how to weigh and measure the ingredients and mix them in a bowl, Lena can’t help but think how lucky Ruby is. The girl comes back from her chores and watches her mother with big eyes, trying to remember the instructions alongside Lena. Lena has no memories of her birth mother, but she imagines a scene like this if they had ever had a life together. She suppresses a sigh, pushing the negative thoughts to the back of her mind to focus on what’s in front of her.

Lena gets to spread the cherries on top of the crust, and Sam teases her for the carefulness with which she does it. Ruby claps her hands together in excitement when the cake goes into the oven.

“Would you like a cup of tea?”, Sam asks when Lena gives her back the apron and folds it neatly to put away in a drawer.

Lena nods, and after Sam prepares tea, they make themselves comfortable on the back porch overlooking the small yard. It’s overgrown and unkept, a refreshing change from the neat flower beds at the Luthor house. The air is alive with bees and butterflies, and Lena closes her eyes. The taste of the tea is sweet on her tongue.

“I’m afraid I do not have much of a green thumb,” Sam laughs as she observes her garden. “But I do enjoy spending my free hours here as the porch faces south.”

“It is quite lovely this way,” Lena agrees and hums.

Sam is several years older than her, and once again Lena finds herself amazed at the freedom she possesses. Even if Lena had her own house, she would not have the backyard in her own image, but her husband’s. From the way her fiancé tends to scold the gardeners at the Luthor house for the tiniest bit of soil left on the lawn, she knows it would be unlike the endearing overgrow in this garden. She winces as she thinks back to the stiff proposal, and the way Benoit had looked at her like she was a precious good, something he can call his own and use to decorate the sitting room.

It makes Lena wonder what Sam’s husband would think of the garden. Would he let it be or have it tended to immaculately? Her friend rarely mentions her husband, but Lena isn’t one to push her. All she knows is that he is working in California, sending his wife and daughter money and letters. It brings to mind a conversation with Sam she had the last time they had gone to a café.

She turns to Ruby, who is sitting on the porch with her legs over the low edge, dribbling a small ball between her bare feet. “Did you finish your letter to your father, Ruby?”

Ruby stops short, and the ball rolls away onto the grass. She turns around and gives her mother a questioning look. Lena bites her lip. She finds the girl’s reaction peculiar - she clearly remembers Sam telling her about the letter, even going to have Ruby’s photograph taken to include it.

Sam gives Ruby a subtle nod, and before Lena can ponder to it Ruby exclaims: “Of course!”

The girl jumps up. “I asked for him to return to us by Christmas this year, but he is always so reluctant to leave his well-paying job, and he says the weather is much nicer down there. It’s a shame.” Her face becomes clouded and she looks inside the house through the glass door, avoiding both women’s eyes.

Sam puts down her teacup and folds her hands in her lap. Her ring shines in the light, and Lena finds her gaze drawn to it for a moment. “Why don’t we look after the pie? It must be done any minute now!”

Lena only nods, and they head inside. The pie is slightly burned on one side, but smells delicious, nonetheless. Even as they head back outside and eat their pie, however, Lena cannot help but feel awkward at their previous exchange. She decides that she should apologize for her blunt question, but there seems to be no opportunity.

Their conversation has moved on, Sam telling her about her most recent job to sew ten Sunday dresses to a family that has newly arrived in the city. Ruby eats her pie in silence, then drops her fork on the plate with a loud clatter.

“May I go to Ann’s house?” she asks, and Sam sighs.

“Alright, but be home by sundown.”

Ruby hugs her mother and then Lena goodbye. They can hear the front door closing with a thud not a minute later. Sam picks up the plate that Ruby left on the porch and puts it onto the low table.

She shakes her head in amusement. “Her friend Ann dances ballet and has been trying to teach her. Ruby hurt her ankle the last time. She makes a fool out of herself each time she tries to shuffle her feet, but she seems to enjoy it nonetheless.”

“She wants to be a dancer, just like her mother once was,” Lena says and laughs.

She takes a sip from her tea. It is clear that Sam wishes to move the conversation away from the previous topic, but Lena’s thoughts cannot help but linger on it. It seems as if Sam is avoiding talking about her husband, which strikes Lena as strange, since usually when she sees Sam and Ruby at church, they are never reluctant to talk of him.

Sam laughs too. “I do prefer it to her playing a rough sport, I must say. A few weeks ago, I caught her and Ann playing baseball with two brothers who live down the street. Oh, the bruises she had when I prepared her bath that night.” She shakes her head.

Lena is silent for a while. She can’t help but think of her own childhood on the Luthor estate on the opposite coast. “Why won’t you let her play baseball with the boys?”

“Oh, I didn’t forbid it. I just … I would prefer it if she enjoyed quieter activities. She enjoyed the boardgame we bought, to my great relief. I only want the best for her, I want her to be something when she grows up.” Sam eats another piece of cherry pie.

Lena hums. Her voice is quiet. “I did not get to play outside after I was adopted by the Luthors. Lillian used to say ‘Luthors don’t play, Lena’, and so I spent my time learning embroidery, reading, and playing chess with Lex. Sometimes we would attend horse races, but they were so boring, and they were only business opportunities for father.”

Lena and Sam look at each other. Lena can see the crinkle between Sam’s eyebrow has deepened, a sign that she is turning Lena’s anecdote over in her head. Lena sighs.

“I would have given anything to play baseball outside and get my dress all dirty. Ruby will be a bright and brilliant young woman when she grows up. But I pray you, let her enjoy playing outside with boys. They will all grow up in the blink of an eye, still.”

Sam lets out a deep sigh. She studies Lena’s face for another moment before she speaks. “You are right, Lena. Forgive me. I simply worry about her. You know, since we moved around so much when she was smaller-“ Sam stops abruptly and averts her gaze.

Lena tilts her head. She does not recall Sam mentioning them moving multiple times, all she knows is that they are from New York, like herself. “You mean, from New York?”, she asks.

Sam doesn’t meet her gaze. “Yes,” she mumbles and reaches for her plate.

Lena wishes she could ask more, ask about Ruby’s father, but she feels like she has already crossed that line today. She drinks the rest of her tea, and they sit in silence for a while. It is not uncomfortable, rather each of them seems to be caught up in their own thoughts. There is a slight tension, however, and Lena wishes she knew how to resolve it.

Sam has been nothing but welcoming towards Lena, has felt like the big sister Lena had desperately wished for when she was growing up. Yet now that Lena has stepped into her house for the first time, she cannot help but feel like she is intruding on something. On what, she isn’t sure. She mindlessly shoves a few pieces of pie crust back and forth on her plate.

“Oh, I meant to ask you, Lena. Do you need me to order a new pair of sandals?” Sam asks after a while, and a wide grin appears on her face.

Lena simultaneously relaxes, as the tension seems to have dispersed, and furrows her brows in confusion. “Pardon?”

Sam only grins wider. “On Sunday you briefly told me that you had went to the shoemaker again to meet the girl, what was her name? Kara?”

Lena groans and covers her face with her hands. Indeed, she had briefly seen Sam and Ruby after the mass on Sunday, whispering to Sam that she had met Kara again. But Lillian had interrupted them, urging Lena to hurry home.

“Luthors attend service to be seen by, not to mingle with the crowds, Lena”, Lillian always told her. Lena had not yet had a chance to tell Sam everything, and despite her mind being mostly occupied by Kara these days, it had slipped her mind until now.

“Oh, yes,” she says in a hushed tone even now that they are in the privacy of Sam’s garden with only the butterflies eavesdropping, “I went to have my shoes repaired, and she was kind enough to deliver them to my door the next day.” Lena hopes that her face is not as red as it feels.

Sam raises an eyebrow. “You had a pair of shoes to repair?”

“Yes” Lena tries for a neutral tone, but she knows that she failed when Sam’s expression doesn’t change.

Sam only looks at her, silently daring her to tell her more. Lena’s face heats up even more under the scrutiny, and before she knows it, she is stammering her way through an explanation. “My … my new Sunday shoes. They were … in need of a repair.”

“I cannot believe that your father would ever gift you shoes of such subpar quality they were in need of repair after only a few weeks in use,” Sam says drily.

“No, of course not!” Lena exclaims with wide eyes, and it is only a moment later when she realizes her mistake.

Sam’s grin becomes impossibly wide.

“I … I was hoping to see her again, I was intrigued by our short interaction last week. But for want of a good reason to visit the shop, I needed to create one.” Lena looks down and bites her lip. Sam will laugh at her, she knows it. Her own actions sound ridiculous to her own ears by now.

“I ripped off the clasp of my new shoes, and-“

Just as she had feared, she is interrupted by Sam’s bursting laughter. She ducks her head in shame and her fingers fumble with her teacup. Her face feels unbearably hot, and she cannot seem to look her friend in the eye.

Sam laughs and laughs, pulling out her handkerchief to wipe at the tears in her eyes. “Oh, Lena …” she says when she eventually calms down. She lets out an audible breath, regaining her composure.

“I do not mean to laugh at your expense, but that was truly a most pitiful measure to take.”

Lena cannot suppress a smile of her own then. Her measures might have been ungodly, but she had achieved her aim: to spend time with Kara. She looks at Sam, and when her friend catches her eyes, they both disrupt into another fit of unrestricted laughter.

It feels freeing. The tension not only from their previous conversation, but from the last few weeks of Lena’s life seems to resolve, and Lena feels a lightness in her chest that hasn’t been there in a long time. She pulls out her own handkerchief to wipe her tears of laughter away, and when they have both calmed down, Sam sinks down in her chair.

“Do go on, Lena. I wish to hear how your excellent plan worked out.” She grins as she says it and stretches her legs in a comfortable manner.

Lena clears her throat and tells Sam about the creek and the blackberries. If she holds back on the feeling of Kara’s hand in her own, Sam needs not know.

***

Lena makes her way up Harbor Road, clutching her purse tightly. The shop comes into view, the fading paint of “Danvers Footwear” now familiar. Nevertheless, her heartbeat picks up in anticipation.

A week after their walk to the creek, Kara had come knocking on Lena’s door again. She had been dressed immaculately, with her hair up and a clean blouse, yet Eve had raised an eyebrow at Lena as Lena had prepared to leave. Her maid knew all too well that Lena had no social circle apart from Sam and that she refused to make friends with anyone Lillian would introduce her to. Lena had decidedly ignored Eve and left the house in a haste.

Once they had reached the clearing, however, Lena had turned towards Kara with a frown on her face. “My mother cannot find out about me befriending you.”

Kara had hung her head low before nodding in understanding. They had agreed that Lena would stop by the Danvers workshop instead.

However, when Lena had stopped by two days ago, Alex had been there alone.

“Kara’s feeling under the weather. I’m afraid she can’t come out for a walk today,” Alex had said while looking Lena up and down.

Lena had felt foolish. There had been something in the way that Alex had scrutinized her that had made her not want to inquire further. “I see. I shall come back in the next few days.”

Now Lena is standing in front of the worn, wooden door once more. She knocks, and she hears Alex answering from within. “Come in!”

“Lena!” She is greeted by Kara from across the room.

Her friend dashes over to her and engulfs her in a hug. Lena is surprised for a split second, then hugs Kara back. Kara rests her head on Lena’s shoulder and holds her tightly. For a moment, it overwhelms Lena. Kara holds onto Lena like they haven’t seen each other in years, when it has only been a little over two weeks. Lena squeezes her back, hoping it provides some comfort.

They part when they hear Alex clearing her throat. Kara ignores her sister and looks at Lena instead. “I’m sorry I didn’t see you when you came over last time.”

Lena gives her a sad smile. “It is alright. Are you better now?”

Kara only nods, then takes her by the hand and leads her to the door across the room. “Come in, I want to explain.”

Lena can see Alex pretending to be busy at the counter, not acknowledging Lena’s presence. They enter the living area behind the shop. A small corridor leads to the kitchen, and in passing Lena can see a backdoor and a steep staircase that leads upstairs. The kitchen is simple. Jars line the shelves on the wall, and Lena notices the mis-matched, colorful china next to them, looking out of place in comparison to the simplicity of the rest of the house. There is a wooden dining table in the middle.

Kara sits down, and Lena follows suit. Kara clears her throat. “You must be confused why Alex sent you away.” She looks down at her hands, then to Lena. Her chin is quivering. “You see, this time of the year is always hard for me.”

She swallows. Lena wants to tell her that she needs not explain herself if she doesn’t wish to, but Kara continues before she can get the words out. “It was the death anniversary of my parents. No matter how many years have passed, I can never seem to get out of bed and face the world on that day.”

“Kara …” Lena whispers, and reaches out a hand. Kara had never mentioned the circumstances of her parents’ death before, only that she was adopted by the Danvers. Despite their short acquaintance, Lena feels silly for not knowing the importance of the day when she had come over. Her heart aches for her new friend, it’s a pain she can relate to. She takes Kara’s hand in hers.

“I know how you feel. It does not get easier, no matter how much time passes. I am not mad with you for not wanting to see me. Even if the official mourning period ends, the pain and grief never do. I understand, Kara.”

A single tear rolls down Kara’s cheek, and Lena leans closer to wipe it away with her other hand. Kara closes her eyes at the touch. “Thank you, Lena. I’m grateful that I met you.”

Lena’s heart skips a beat. “I am, too.”

Kara does not seem to want to share more about her parents, and Lena does not pressure her. They stay like that for a while, quietly enjoying the comfort of the other’s touch. Lena cannot remember the last time she has shared such intimacy with someone. Lillian has never hugged her or wiped away her tears. Yet with Kara, it feels natural, despite them not having known each other for a long time. Lena quietly wonders if that is the reason for Alex’ resentment towards her, but she pushes that thought to the back of her mind.

They separate, and Lena speaks up. “I brought cold lemonade. And a book for you, Kara.”

Kara’s eyes light up like a child’s on Christmas Eve, and it makes Lena smile. She reaches for her purse and pulls out the bottles of lemonade she had bought on the way.

“I have not had lemonade since maybe I was a child,” Kara says as she unceremoniously pops the lid of the bottle. She gives Lena a bright smile, then takes a sip.

“Thank you, Lena.”

Lena takes a sip of her own. “My pleasure.”

“You brought a book?” Kara asks, unable to hide her curiosity.

Lena laughs. “Yes. Remember the book you told me about the first time we walked together?”

“Oh yes!” Kara exclaims. “I finished it when I went to the library again the other day. It’s a shame I had to rush to finish it because it was due.”

Lena pulls the book out of her purse, and Kara’s eyes go wide. “I bought it, because I wanted to read it for myself, too. But then I was unsure if you had finished it, so I wanted to give it to you.”

“May I borrow it for a while?” Kara asks as she flips through the pages. “I wanted to re-read some passages but I had no time for it.” She closes the book and runs her finger over the title and the small illustration of the sphinx.

“Of course. Have it as long as you like. It’s best that my mother does not know I bought such a story, anyways.” Lena says and lets out a low laugh.

“I can hear her disapproval already. _Time travel, Lena? You mustn’t read such nonsense!_ ” She does a mocking imitation of Lillian’s voice before she takes another sip of her lemonade.

Kara grins, then asks: “How did you like the story?”

Lena hums. “It made me think a lot, and there was a night when I stayed up late reading, unable to sleep. I asked myself if I would like to travel in time, and would I travel into the past or the future? I do think it impossible to build such a time machine, but I think I would like to see what the world is like in the near future. Will we still have horse-drawn carriages, or will we have streetcars even in the smallest towns? We are making such advances in medicine, imagine the knowledge of the future! Will there still be contagious disease and hunger? I would like to know that. But I do not wish to travel so far in time as the time traveler.”

She thinks she has talked too much, fears that Kara thinks her rambling dull, but she finds Kara gazing at her with a wondrous expression on her face when she looks up.

“I thought the same thing,” she says. “Eliza talks about women participating in politics sometimes. It was something Jeremiah advocated for at the City Hall, even though other men would laugh in his face and call him a fool for it.” Kara sighs. “I do not wish to see the distant future either, it sounded quite scary. But I am curious about if women will ever be allowed to vote. Imagine that!”

Lena smiles. “I wonder, too.”

Then she sighs. “The presidential election is drawing nearer, and I understand the articles in the papers just as well as the men. But they do not want to hear our opinions, they want to make decisions that affect us, too. I wish we had a time machine to go to a future in which we can make our own decisions.”

Kara nods. “How did you find the creatures in the distant future that the time traveler tells of? I must say, I found both quite scary. Even if there is some resemblance to humans of our time … so many people work in dark factories around the clock while others do not work at all.”

She pauses. “The time traveler thought upon his arrival that the whole world had become a garden, that humanity had peaked in its pursuit of peace and intelligence. And yet, the reality was far from it. It is strange to think that despite the advances of our civilization, humanity could evolve to be as child-like as the Elois, or as scary as the Morlocks.”

Lena looks down at her hands and nods in silent agreement. She had spent the night awake after she had turned the last page, thinking about the possibility of such a distant future as the Traveller described. If humans were to evolve into either Elois or Morlocks, which species would she belong to?

“It’s strange, isn’t it? To think of oneself as either one of those?” she whispers, more to herself than to Kara. “I needn’t worry where my food or shelter comes from, and yet I felt no connections with the Elois at all. I had never bathed in the creek, or frolicked in the grass, at least not since living with the Luthors. I am to be educated, but not more than the men, and never show my true emotions. Though my fiancé would certainly be delighted if I was more like little Weena.” She lets out a low laugh.

When she looks up, she finds Kara staring at her, her blue eyes filled with concern. Before Kara can speak, however, Lena asks her what has been on her mind since the day that Kara had returned the shoe box to her house. “Kara, do you think me one of those aloof creatures who merely exist without any purpose?”

“No Lena, how can you think such a thing?” Kara says and moves closer to Lena again, pushing the bottle of lemonade away.

“You are not aloof. You have known grief and pain, you were brought to a new country at a very young age into a family that does not see your true worth. You find ways to fight against the dull boredom that was forced upon you every day. You are a brilliant, kind-hearted, beautiful soul. You may not want for food or shelter, but your heart is filled with grief and longing.”

Lena swallows thickly. “But so is yours.”

“It is.” Kara says, her voice sounding hoarse. She clears her throat. “And I agonize over it constantly. The truth is, if my parents were alive today, I would not cry myself to sleep on an empty stomach almost every night. But we have to remind ourselves that these things are out of our control. It is true that the world is unjust at this moment in time. I wish that every man and woman had enough work, and enough leisure at the same time, and I wish that no child had to grief the loss of their parents.”

Kara pauses and takes a deep breath. Lena feels tears behind her eyes, threatening to spill over. She cannot help but admire Kara’s insight, how her words seem to pierce directly into her heart.

“You are nothing like your family, Lena, or the creatures in the story. I do not think that any person alive today would be any of the two species. You are most clever and bricky, and I greatly enjoy your company.” Kara looks at Lena with an intense gaze that threatens to burn through Lena.

Lena wants to say something profound, wants to prove to Kara that she is right and that she is not a waste of Kara’s time. Her own curiosity towards the blonde had led her here, curiosity towards this young woman who leads a most unusual life. Now she finds that not only her life, but also her heart is most unusual.

“Thank you, Kara. I greatly enjoy your company, too.” It doesn’t nearly express what she wants to say to Kara, but she cannot find the words. She barely knows Kara, yet at the same time she feels like they have known each other for a long time. No one has ever related to her grief in the same way. Not Sam, not her old maid or her old friends.

Kara smiles at her, her eyes crinkling. There is still sadness behind it, however, and Lena takes Kara’s hand into her own for the second time that afternoon. She is still getting used to this, to the ease with which they share a space.

The first time Kara had taken her hand after their first walk, Lena had felt the blood rush in her ears, a sensation that lingers even now with the brush of Kara’s fingers against hers. She admires the way Kara gives affection so easily, the way with which she talks about Eliza and Alex. It does not even begin to compare with the way things are in the Luthor household.

“What are you thinking about?” Kara asks, and Lena realizes she has been staring at their entwined hands for too long.

She blushes. “Just … thinking.” She feels foolish. She feels foolish around Kara a lot.

Kara’s gaze catches hers, and they study each other for a while. Kara’s eyes are a little bit red from crying, and the close proximity allows Lena to see a small scar between her eyebrows for the first time. She resists the urge to run a thumb over it, to ask how it came about. Lena swallows, and she can see Kara do the same. Kara eyes are tracking Lena’s face in a similar fashion.

A thought enters Lena head then, so forcefully and unexpectedly that her breath hitches in her throat. Lena wants to kiss Kara. Once she has thought it, she cannot seem to make it disappear. Kara is in front of her, her blue eyes kind and enchanting, and Lena wants to feel her lips on her own.

She looks back from Kara to their entwined hands, and Kara seems to snap out of a daze as she clears her throat. Lena thinks of the magazine articles that Jack had sent her. The American dancer who performs in France, and who loves a woman who dresses like a man. She swallows thickly. She had been unable to explain it, this pull she had felt towards this most unusual woman.

In this short moment, looking into Kara’s eyes, she finds it is a similar pull she has been feeling towards Kara – an inexplicable longing and curiosity. Her heartrate picks up. She feels drawn to Kara, in a way she cannot bring herself to be drawn towards her fiancé. It makes sense, and at the same time it brings about a confusion unlike anything Lena has ever felt. Like knowing that above grey clouds, the sky is blue and clear, but not being able to see through them.

Kara gently pulls at Lena’s hand. When Lena looks up, there is a questioning look in Kara’s eyes. Kara gives her a mischievous smile, and Lena panics for a second that Kara somehow knows what she had been thinking about. She scrambles for words.

“Where did you get the scar between your eyebrows from?” As soon as the words leave her mouth, Lena feels hot embarrassment creep up her neck. But Kara laughs, a deep and genuine laugh. Lena wants to ask silly questions all the time, if it means she gets to hear it.

Kara runs her thumb along the palm of Lena’s hand as she speaks. “I fell out of a tree when I was a child. Winn and I would run wild all the time.” She grins.

Lena laughs too. Relief floods through her, though about what exactly she is unsure. To see Kara laughing instead of crying, perhaps. Or to be closer to seeing the blue sky behind the grey clouds, even if only a little bit.

“Why don’t we go for a walk?” Kara asks after a moment. “Not anywhere far, just down to the harbor. Or go to Winn’s store, I have been telling him about you and now he wants to meet you again.”

Lena’s eyes go wide. “Really?”

Kara nods.

“I would like a walk.” Lena agrees. She does, she feels like she needs to clear her head.

When Kara lets go of her hand as they walk back inside the shop and then onto the street, Lena almost regrets her decision. She can feel Alex’ stare burning into her back as they leave. However, spending the rest of her afternoon by Kara’s side is a luxury in its own right, and so she does not dwell on what Alex thinks of her or how she wants to hold Kara’s hand or kiss her lips.

***

Their walks become a regular event in the weeks that follow. Sometimes they go uphill to their creek – there is an old oak tree on a meadow nearby that Kara shows her -, sometimes they walk without an aim, or they stop by Winn’s shop. Lena makes it a habit to bring something to the Danvers shop each time she goes to meet Kara. She brings lemonade, tins of sour balls, bags of tea, and once a block of writing paper from Jack’s stationary store in London, after Kara had mentioned Alex scolding her for using the shop’s paper to write on. Kara has kept the book Lena had brought her, but Lena does not ask for it back.

To Lena, these small gifts are nothing more than that – something to show her appreciation for Kara. And Kara, Kara always smiles bright at everything Lena gifts her. She even keeps the empty tin boxes that contained the sour balls, Lena notices one day, to keep her hair pins in. Alex, however, says nothing, even when Lena starts to bring something for her and Eliza, too. She never meets Eliza, but Kara tells her that her mother appreciates the small gifts and asks about Lena’s well-being.

Lena wishes she could say the same about her own mother, but she knows better than to talk to her about her friendship with Kara, much less about how she uses her spending money. Eve still looks at her in suspicion every time she leaves the house, but the maid seems to keep her suspicions to herself, and for that Lena is thankful. She gives neither her mother nor her maid too much thought, however. The only thing she wishes she knew was how to make Alex tolerate her. But Kara does not seem to care for Alex’ opinion on Lena, so Lena does not bring it up.

They’re sitting on the tree trunk at the creek, the spot Kara had taken Lena to on their first walk. Kara is munching on the sour balls Lena had given her, and there is a blue stain on her shirt from the berries she had picked for Lena earlier. The air feels colder here than in the city, and a hint of fall sweeps through the leaves of the tall trees.

Kara is sitting close to Lena, so close that their hips are touching, and Lena can feel the warmth of her body. Lena has grown used to the easy way with which Kara gives affection by now, the comfort of having her by her side. It never ceases to strike her with wonder, however, each and every time. Lena doesn’t know if Kara does it intentionally or not, but now that she knows the comfort of her casual touch, she cannot imagine having ever lived without it.

She still thinks about kissing Kara. It’s a thought that has never left since the first time it had entered her mind in Kara’s kitchen all those weeks ago. However, she manages to keep it in the back of her mind, doesn’t let herself think about it when she’s around Kara lest she is reduced to a blushing and stuttering fool. It’s only when she is alone in her chamber at night that she lets her imagination run freely. It is also something she would never admit to anyone. Not to Sam, and not even in her letters to Jack.

Their conversation has stopped a while ago, and they have been sitting in comfortable silence since. Lena lets out a long sigh, and it makes Kara turn her head.

“Are you alright?”

Lena nods. After another moment, she speaks. “I am. I was simply thinking again of my brother’s letter from last week. I wonder about them.”

Kara hums in response. “Where are they, you said?”

“The letter stated they were headed for the Yukon as there seems to be a promising find. It was likely their last letter before the winter.” Lena says and sighs again.

The promising find, of course, being gold. Lena still cannot imagine her brother digging into frozen ground for gold. At the same time, however, she can see him and Benoit do anything to become richer than they already are. And her father, well. She wonders about him the most.

“I would love to go up north, just for the adventure of it,” Kara says and interrupts Lena’s worries. “And yet I know that I would likely perish after one cold winter night.” She chuckles.

Lena cannot help but grin. “Oh, imagine me in a simple cabin in the woods! To collect snow for tea! Not for all the gold in the world!”

They both laugh. Kara pushes the sour ball into the hollow of her cheek like a hamster. She gives Lena a mischievous glint.

“Oh, my French magazines! Mother, has the mailman brought a letter from London?” she exclaims. Her attempt at imitating Lena’s accent sends Lena into another fit of laughter.

“I do sound nothing like that!” Lena exclaims, but her giggles betray any attempt at a stern voice.

Kara moves the sourball around in her mouth, and Lena thinks for a moment she looks like a child. “Well, you would if you were with them up north!” Kara chuckles again.

“I am surely glad to be here where I have a warm chamber and solid sidewalks,” Lena replies and grins. After a heartbeat, she adds: “And to be where you are.”

Kara stills for a moment, but then she winks at Lena. “Oh, you would rather keep me company than your rich fiancé? Scandalous, Miss Luthor!”

“Be quiet!” Lena laughs.

She wonders for a brief moment what had caused Kara to pause. She had spoken the truth – she would not follow the men of her family up north for all the gold in the world, especially not now that she had Kara by her side. She wonders if Kara thought it a jest, if she does not believe the sincerity of Lena’s words. But Kara gently nudges her shoulder, and it keeps Lena’s mind from wandering astray.

“Have you brought the magazine you had been meaning to show me?”

Lena blushes, but she nods slowly. “I have.”

She grabs for her purse and pulls out the French magazine Jack had sent her months ago. It’s well-read by now, and the pages are smeared from Lena’s pencil where she made notes on vocabulary. She hands it to Kara, and a sudden nervousness rises in her chest. Sharing the article and the dancer she has been so infatuated with feels intimate, as if she is handing Kara her diary. It’s alright, she tells herself. Kara cannot read French, after all.

Kara takes the magazine and opens it with great interest. Her eyes scan the pages and take in the pictures. She hums to herself as she traces the form of the illustrated dresses. Lena watches her, biting the inside of her cheek.

“This is an American dancer who is popular in Paris,” she starts explaining once Kara reaches the page of the Louie Fuller article.

Kara only nods and takes in the page. It almost looks like her eyes are following the lines of text, but before Lena can be sure Kara looks up and gives her an encouraging smile to keep talking.

“I, uh, I saw her performance. It was most fascinating. She is not the most beautiful woman, but she is captivating. The light show of her performance was talked about much at the theaters in Paris when I visited.” Lena fiddles with the hem of her skirt.

Kara hums in response, not looking up from the article. After a while, she closes the pages and puts it next to her onto the tree trunk. She gives Lena an uncharacteristic shy glance.

“Will you tell me about Europe? I’ve only ever left Washington State once …”

Lena nods slowly. “I already told you I was born in Ireland, but … I don’t have many memories of it. Three years ago, when my father and my brother decided they wanted to expand our business to the West Coast, they also decided to take a family trip to Europe. It was mostly because it would be harder to cross the Atlantic once we moved West, but also to find someone adequate for me to marry. Father couldn’t find anyone from the elite class of New York City agreeable,” she says and lets out a low huff.

Kara presses her lips tightly together but says nothing. Lena continues. “The trip was greatly enjoyable, for the most part. I begged my father to take me to Dublin so I might visit the city of my first four years of life, and despite mother being against it, he did. We only stayed for a few days, but I would wander the streets alone and imagine my birth mother doing the same, and it brought me great peace.”

Kara smiles at her, then reaches out to squeeze Lena’s hand. They rarely talk about their family histories, and Lena takes comfort in knowing that Kara knows just how difficult of a topic it can be to talk about.

“We visited London, Paris, Nice, Munich, Vienna, Florence, and Venice. It was a dream come true. My maid at the time, Jess, came with us at my request, and she and I would stay up late every night to talk about the sights we had seen. Mother forbade her to come with us to the theaters and the restaurants, but I nevertheless spent so much time with her that I would forget she was my maid and not my closest friend. Eve is great, but it’s a shame Jess had to stay in New York when we moved here.” Lena can feel herself drifting off from the topic of her travels, but as usual when she talks to Kara, she feels as if she can talk endlessly. There is something tranquil about sitting by the creek next to Kara and giving voice to whatever memory resurfaces.

“I met Jack in London. He attended a ball one of my father’s business acquaintances hosted. I’ve told you about him, but he was really unlike any man I had ever met. He was handsome and charming, and he asked me about my opinion on economics and philosophy and was a great conversation partner. We didn’t even dance together; we just talked all evening.”

“Why did your parents not consider him an agreeable marriage prospect?” Kara asks the obvious question.

Lena sighs. “He is rich, and he has business in London and Bombay. But you see, this is the problem. My parents do not care that he is smart, that he speaks three languages or that they could collaborate with his import business. I will have a white man for a husband, or no husband at all.”

“That’s a shame,” Kara says, giving her a sympathetic look.

“Mother acts like tolerating his letters is a charitable act,” Lena adds and sighs again. “Lex does not seem to mind my friendship with Jack as much, he even helped me pick a postcard to send to him from Paris. But he did not agree for Jack to marry me, either.”

Kara tilts her head slightly. “Did you meet Benoit in Paris?”

“I did,” Lena says and sighs so deeply that it makes Kara chuckle.

“I hated him the moment I laid eyes on him. He never attempted to engage me in a conversation, talking about me to my father as if I wasn’t standing right next to them. Father even seemed intimidated by him. Benoit was most interested in a business partnership with Lex. And, as things go in the world, my family found him agreeable and decided I should marry him. He looked at me like I was a prize he won at a race, an object to decorate his home. When he spoke to me it was only in English, as if he could not acknowledge I speak French just as well as Lex. It was infuriating, and the night after we met him, I cried to Jess for hours.”

Kara squeezes her hand again in reassurance. Lena gives her a sad smile and takes a moment to collect her thoughts.

“Fortunately, the offer of marriage was only a verbal agreement for the time being, and we continued our trip to Italy. I shall not think what I would have done had we married right there in Paris. I would have flung myself into the Seine at night.” She lets out a hollow laugh.

“Benoit joined our party in Florence, however, and it was about as enjoyable as you might imagine. I asked to extend the trip to Pompeii, I was desperate to see the ruins of the ancient city. I had been reading quite a few articles on its discovery and the research. Father wanted to grant me my wish, but Benoit said that he didn’t want his future wife to be more well-travelled than himself, and so the matter was discussed no further. Oh, I hated him, Kara.”

“You should have flung _him_ into the Seine at night,” Kara says, and Lena cannot stop the laughter that bursts out of her.

Kara chuckles. Lena looks at her for a long moment. Kara makes her frustrations with her fiancé seem bearable in a way she cannot explain. It might be the fact that he is far away, but Lena never quite seems to be so carefree when she is by herself. It makes her not want to waste her time with talk of Benoit a second longer and instead take in every moment she gets to spend by Kara’s side.

So, she does just that. She continues to tell Kara of only the beautiful things she saw in Europe, like the lemon trees on the side of the street in Florence, or the variety of bread at the bakeries and pastry shops in Munich and Vienna. Kara listens intently and asks clever questions, and Lena forgets about business and marriage arrangements completely.

Kara tells her about her father taking her to Victoria on business when she was younger, the only time she has left the city in her life, and they sit close to each other, holding each other’s hand for most of the time. When they say their goodbyes when the sun is about to set, Lena feels at peace in a way she hasn’t in a long time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading <3


	5. Chapter 5

_1897_

Three days later, Kara returns home from a bath in the creek just as the sun is about to set. Alex is finishing repainting the old sign above the door. _Danvers Footwear, est. 1880_ shines in a new, deep blue, and underneath it next to the window there is a new, freshly painted sign: _We outfit for the Klondike. Buy one pair of mining boots with two pairs of wool socks for $4,95_.

Alex is grinning up at her when she sees her and wipes the sweat out of her face. “You’re back. Did you pick any blackberries or did the bears eat ‘em all?”

Kara laughs and holds up the jar of berries in triumph. “I defeated a bear in hand-to-hand combat just for you to get ‘em!”

Alex does a motion of flicking paint at Kara’s freshly washed hair, and Kara shrieks “You daren’t!”, but they both erupt in laughter.

“You should visit the creek too, Alex. The water is cold and it’s as peaceful as ever up there,” Kara says softly when they’ve collected themselves.

They’ve been working almost around the clock, making shoes during the day, running errands and doing housework in the early mornings and at night. There are no long lines at their counter anymore, to their relief, but they still get a handful of new orders each day. Especially Alex has been reluctant to enjoy even a few minutes of leisure. Kara feels that her sister is trying to prove herself as the business owner, as if trying to make up for the lost time of the previous years.

“I will,” Alex promises and wipes at her face again. She looks tired suddenly. “I will go with the first daylight of the morning.”

“Come inside and get washed up. I will put the blackberries in the ice box, and then make dinner. Has Charlie returned to the boarding house already?” Kara asks.

Alex lifts up the bucket of paint to carry it inside. “No, he is in the kitchen. He is practicing his ABCs.” She smiles, and Kara returns it.

In the short amount of time that Charlie has helped them at the shop, it has become clear how much Alex adores the young boy. He is quick-witted and a fast learner. He mostly helps Kara on the sewing machine, but they can see him doing more soon. He doesn’t talk much of his past or his family, but if anything, Kara and Alex can understand that better than anyone. Instead, he likes to make them laugh by making silly faces at them over their sandwiches on their lunch break.

When Kara walks into the kitchen, Charlie doesn’t look up. He is too engrossed in his writing, his tongue between his teeth and a tight grip on the pencil. Kara laughs to herself. “Hello, buddy! How’s your writing exercise going?”

“Kara!” The boy exclaims and holds up the sheet of paper. Big, wry letters are scattered across the page, his hand still unsteady and clumsy.

Alex had suggested she teach him the alphabet the night before, and Charlie had agreed with great enthusiasm. Kara had gone upstairs to give him the writing paper she had once received from Lena. It is precious to her, but seeing Charlie use it fills her with more joy than her own unrefined attempts at poems that she would rip out and stuff into a drawer on her side of the vanity.

She takes a look at the C H A R L I E, A L E X, K A R A and E L I Z A and smiles at him. “Good job, buddy! You’re eating dinner with us?”

Charlie nods and smiles. He waits for Kara to put the jar of blackberries away before he speaks. “Miss Jackson has been making a fuss. All the rooms are full, new people come and go every day. Everybody wants to look for gold. She has no time for me.” His face turns solemn.

“Well, we have time for you, buddy.” she says softly, and Charlie looks up to her with a smile.

She goes to wash her hands, then starts to prepare dinner. She has just cut the potatoes and onions and is about to heat up butter in the frying pan when there is a knock on the shop’s door. She suppresses a groan. They have enough work, and she wants to have the food ready before Eliza comes home.

Alex has just come in from the backdoor, standing underneath the stairs in her undergarment. She gives Kara a look. “Do not answer it, Kara. Please. I just wanna put my feet up.”

Kara hesitates. There is another knock and a voice that calls out. “I’m not a client. I’m Samantha, a friend of Lena’s.”

Kara’s eyes go wide, and she dashes toward the door. She fumbles with the lock in her haste to open it.

“Miss Samantha!” she exclaims once the door is open and she is face to face with Lena’s friend. She has only met her once briefly, at Winn’s shop over a year ago. It feels like a lifetime ago. Her eyes dart to the girl standing next to Samantha. It must be Ruby, she thinks. Lena would talk about the two of them sometimes. The girl is taller than Kara had imagined. Her skin is tan, and she eyes Kara with noticeable curiosity.

Kara quickly looks back to the girl’s mother. “What brings you here, Miss Samantha?”

The woman laughs. “Just Sam is fine. You’re Kara, right?”

Kara nods, but something tells her that Sam only asks to be polite. She can feel crimson creep up her neck. Has Lena confided in her friend about her? The smallest suspicion of Sam knowing of the bond she shares with Lena makes her want to slam the door shut, but she puts on a smile and lets the two in.

The workshop is dark, and she quickly leads them into the back. When they enter, she can hear Alex’ quick footsteps retreating onto the upstairs on the old wooden planks. She doesn’t lead them into the kitchen but instead stops where Alex had been standing earlier. The narrow hallway is illuminated only from the gas lamp in the kitchen and the light coming in from the backdoor that Alex had left ajar.

Sam’s eyes go wide when she sees Charlie sitting in the kitchen, but Kara feels too exhausted to introduce them. Ruby, however, walks into the room like she has always lived here and starts to talk animatedly to him.

“Excuse her behavior, Ruby can be-“ Sam starts to apologize and takes half a step to pull Ruby away, but Kara puts up a hand.

“No worries. Charlie is our new apprentice. They appear to be the same age.” She gives Sam a faint smile.

Sam lets out an audible breath. “Very well. You must wonder why I’m here.”

“Have you got news of Lena?” Kara asks. She cannot think of another reason why Sam would come to her house. The cramped hallway they’re standing in feels entirely too small in that moment, and her chest tightens.

“I’m afraid no,” Sam says, and her expression turns solemn. “I foolishly thought I might find her here. You haven’t had word of her either, since the men came back? The Luthors were not at church on Sunday, where I meet Lena regularly. I worry.”

Kara’s heart sinks. She had been right to worry, she thinks. “No, I have not seen her, since her brother and father came back. And her … her fiancé, of course.” She clears her throat.

She goes on. “I was there when the ship docked. I saw the gold.”

“Really? There must have been quite the crowd!” Sam says. She quickly glances at Ruby in the kitchen, but the two children are talking among themselves. Her eyes soften for a moment before she turns back to Kara.

Kara doesn’t know much about Sam. Lena had occasionally mentioned her, the two of them would go drink tea together or meet at Sam’s house. All she knows is that Sam’s husband works in California, and that Sam is a seamstress.

Before she can say anything, tell Sam how unwell Lionel had looked, or how self-assured Lena’s brother and fiancé, Alex comes down the stairs. She’s wearing one of Eliza’s old tea gowns, and her hair is hastily tied into a bun that has strands of hair standing out in every direction.

When she sees Sam, her eyes go wide for a moment before she schools her expression back into a neutral one. Nevertheless, Sam and Alex regard each other for a long moment. Then, Alex simply nods and heads into the kitchen. She walks past Ruby and Charlie and keeps preparing their dinner right where Kara had left off.

When Sam looks back to Kara, Kara could swear she sees a faint blush on the woman’s cheeks. It is hard to tell in the dim light, however, and Sam is quick to speak up.

“What do you suggest we do?” she asks, and Kara finds herself confused.

“We do?” she echoes.

“Lena. I worry about her. She has come to enjoy such great freedoms in the men’s absence, and I daren’t imagine that they keep her in the house to be away from us. Now that I know you have no news of her either, I wish to find a way to contact her, to know she is alright.”

Hearing Sam mention the freedoms Lena had enjoyed the past year, it’s Kara’s turn to blush. She looks at her feet. She can hear Alex’ voice in her mind, telling her to let Lena go. It is impossible, of course. And yet, despite her worry, she knows she cannot simply show up at the Luthor house. Lena had forbidden it all those months ago, except the one afternoon in the winter when she led Kara there herself … Kara’s cheeks are burning when she looks back up.

“I worry as well. But I cannot go to the Luthor house. Her brother and her maid have seen me before. You may go, if you wish” she says and bites her lip. “When I went to the harbor to see the ship, I saw the Luthors. Her father looked unwell, even from a distance. I worry about Lena, but I know she will come to me when she can.”

She notices Sam looking at her strangely, and she clears her throat. “Or come to you, of course.”

Sam seems to want to say something, but doesn’t. “Very well. I will wait and see if the Luthors come to church this Sunday. If not, I shall come here again.”

Kara nods. “Agreed.”

Sam gives her a small smile. “You are right, by the way. My house may be closer, but Lena would come knocking on your door first.”

It is said without malice or jealousy, but it leaves Kara stunned nonetheless. Sam calls for Ruby to go home, apologizes to Kara and Alex for causing a fuss, and leaves before Kara has made sense of the statement.

At dinner, Charlie excitedly shows Eliza his progress with his ABCs, though he cannot seem to tear his eyes away from the writing paper where Ruby had spelled her name and drawn a picture of herself holding a baseball glove.

Alex asks about how long Sam has lived in Seattle, since she appears to be around Alex’ age but Alex has never seen her before. Growing up in the city before the Great Fire, they used to both know almost every child their age. But Kara can only shrug, only telling her what she knows from Lena.

She falls asleep that night thinking of Lena, and how desperately she needs to feel her in her arms again.

***

Their lunchbreaks become somewhat of a routine. Charlie usually stays with them, and Kara goes to the bakery to bring them sandwiches each day. Taking out money out of the register so nonchalantly still feels strange to her, and on her walk, she tends to grip it tightly, as if it might disappear at any moment.

Kara is dozing off in her chair, half watching Charlie practice his ABCs and drawing people and boats on the paper when a surprised “Oh!” from Alex startles her awake. Her sister is sitting on the other end of the table, hidden behind today’s newspaper.

“What is it, Alex?” she asks and leans forward. Charlie puts his pencil down and eyes Alex with curiosity.

Alex puts the paper on the table and turns it around. “Read!”

“Oh! An article about the Luthors?” Kara asks, but starts reading. Her eyes narrow at first, but then go wide.

“My Goodness! Who would’ve thought he remembered us?” She and Alex stare at each other for a second.

“What’s written in the paper?” Charlie asks, looking between the two of them.

Kara reads: “ _Lex Luthor has come back from the Yukon territory as a wealthier man than he even was before. ‘Fortune is fickle’, he tells our paper with a charismatic grin. He and his father as well as business partner spent only a little more than a year up North. When asked about the prospectors heading for the Klondike by the hundreds since the arrival of the steamer Portland, he gave the advice to invest in appropriate attire. He mentions that the rubber boots he acquired at Danvers Footwear on Harbor Road prior to his departure have been long-lasting and able to withstand the harsh conditions_.”

“He is the rich brother of your friend Lena!” Charlie exclaims, and Kara gives him a sad smile.

“That’s correct, buddy.” She looks back to Alex. “Should we start preparing for an onrush of prospective miners tomorrow?” she asks and grins.

Alex groans. “No. We take four new orders a day the way we agreed to, and no more same-day service. We can barely keep up the way it is.” She leans forward and grabs the paper.

“What are you doing?” Kara asks when Alex gets up.

“I’m cutting out the article, of course.”

Kara hums in response, then takes another page that’s left on the table. “Multiple shops have started selling outfits for the Klondike,” she says as she scans the page with the advertisements.

“I heard the police wants to enforce a minimum of goods a prospective miner has to bring on a ship, because they are worried people are going to starve up there in the winter.” Alex says.

“That’s reasonable. I mean, Winn’s father left with not much more than what he was wearing. I do wonder how far he will get. I do wonder how far any of them will get.” Kara sighs and puts down the paper again.

Charlie looks from the newspaper back to Kara. “I do, too. The white men don’t listen to the land. They only want to take and destroy.”

Kara runs a hand through her loose hair and huffs. “That’s true.”

“Is there an ad for the grocer’s? They were all out of canned goods this morning.” Alex asks from the other side of the room. She cuts out the article and puts it safely away into a drawer.

“Hmm. Let me see.” Kara turns a page and reads through more advertisements. She sees one for Luthor Luxury Imports and stops short. She reads the ad and frowns, wondering how the Luthors plan on continuing their business now. Would they take their sacks of gold and leave again? Or would they look to profit from the influx of people to the city, like the Danvers are doing themselves? She sighs.

Another advertisement catches her eye. “Oh!” She quickly reads it, a smile spreading over her face.

“What is it, Kara?” Alex asks, sitting down on her chair again. “Are candy sticks for sale again?”

“No,” Kara says and looks up. “Look! An announcement for an event at the library. James is holding a photography event next week. One photograph for four cents! I remember him telling me about his new Kodak a while back! We should go, we haven’t had our photograph taken in years!”

Alex, however, does not seem to share her enthusiasm. “I don’t feel like going to the library. You should take Charlie. Have you ever had your photograph taken, Charlie?”

“I haven’t!” Charlie says, eyes widening in excitement.

“Alex.” Kara’s voice is stern. “You cannot avoid the library forever. James asks about you sometimes. He tells me news of Kelly and-“

“I don’t want to hear of it, Kara.”

Kara sighs and crumples the edge of the paper in her hand. Ink stains her fingers, but she makes no move to wipe it off.

“I’ll take you to the library sometime, Charlie. We can get our photograph taken from James and we can borrow a copy of ‘Tom Sawyer’, I’ll read it to you.” She smiles at the boy.

Charlie nods. He quickly glances into Alex’ direction, but then he returns Kara’s smile.

They soon return to work, and in the afternoon, Winn pays them a visit, holding a large cardboard box. “I bring wool socks!” he exclaims and laughs.

Kara puts down her tools and stands up to come to his aid. “Winn! You’re the best! Have you been able to purchase more materials?”

“I have,” Winn nods as he hands her the box. Charlie gets up as well when they open it to inspect the socks. They are plain in color, but either of them doubts that the miners will have much time to worry about fashion in the harsh winter of the North.

Charlie starts taking them out by the pair and arranging them on the shelf for the customers to see when Winn tugs on his arm.

“I heard you’re practicing writing, buddy. I have something for you.”

Charlie’s eyes go wide. He has only met Winn once briefly in the last days, but he had been fascinated when he learned that Winn made toy steam locomotives and ships. Winn had promised to show him his shop one day, however there had not been any time yet.

Winn hands the boy two game boxes. Kara looks over his shoulder in curiosity. One is a box of dominoes. An image from her own childhood flashes before her eyes, her sitting at the table in the parlor, playing the game with her parents. She swallows thickly. Coming to the Danvers household, they used to play card games inside, and baseball outside.

The second box is a game of children’s picture lotto, depicting illustrations of steam ships, locomotives, bicycles and street cars along the letters of the alphabet. Charlie beams.

“Thank you, Winn!” he exclaims, and Winn smiles back at the boy.

“I hope you enjoy them. If you play with Kara, don’t let her trick you!” Winn laughs.

“I don’t trick at board games!” Kara retorts and crosses her arms.

Winn and Alex exchange a glance that makes Winn only laugh more. Kara mumbles something under her breath.

“Say, Kara” Winn starts after a moment, changing the topic. “Have you heard from Lena? I’ve been reading about the Luthors in the paper.”

Kara lets out an audible sigh. “I haven’t”, she says and sits back down on the stool. She tells Winn of Sam’s visit – he remembers her from when she and Lena had bought something at his shop. Alex goes into the kitchen and shows him the newest article she had cut out earlier, and Winn nods, impressed.

When he leaves later, he hugs Kara tightly. “I do hope you hear from her soon. It’s a shame she has to marry the French businessman. I hope they will at least stay in Seattle, though I have my doubts. All that money …”

Kara can only nod and hug her friend back. His sentiment echoes in her mind for the rest of the afternoon, and after dinner she tries to distract herself with a game of dominoes with Charlie. It works only moderately.

***

The rest of the week passes in a blur for Kara. There’s work, errands, chores, newspaper articles … everything in their life seems to revolve around the gold. Kara can hardly believe that it has only been a week since she watched the ship dock at the harbor.

The night before, Eliza had asked Charlie something about his room at the boarding house, and the boy had looked solemn. “Miss Jackson says she wants to rent the room to another worker from next month. Someone coming here to work at the docks, who can pay more rent.”

Eliza had exchanged brief looks with Alex and Kara. It had been news to them. They had only heard of this Miss Jackson as a friendly lady who had taken the boy under her wing. Apparently, however, that had only been the case until the boarding house had more prospective renters than available rooms.

“Where would you stay from August?” Eliza had asked tentatively.

Charlie had only looked at his empty plate. “I know a family that lives by the harbor.”

Kara still feels the sting in her chest now that it is the next morning. The tents by the harbor are a sight known to every local, the settlement that Jeremiah had used to call a ‘disgrace’ at the city hall. ‘Ballast island’, where the people who had lived on this land long before the white settlers had arrived are living on the boulders dumped by the ships that carry the riches of their land off to San Francisco. Kara shudders despite the warm rays of the morning sun.

Charlie’s smile when Eliza had suggested he live with them had been bright and hopeful, and it hasn’t left his face since. He’s dashing next to Kara on the trail uphill, humming a melody unfamiliar to Kara’s ears.

The two of them had gone to the creek to bathe and collect berries on Alex’ request to get out of her hair while she does inventory. Charlie has never been up here, and it reminds Kara of when she had brought Lena here over a year earlier. They reach the meadow, and Kara drops her canvas bag onto the tree trunk. She fishes out Jeremiah’s old baseball glove and a ball, and Charlie’s eyes grow wide in excitement.

Kara laughs and throws the ball towards him. “Catch!”

The boy does and runs a few yards away as Kara slips on the glove. The leather is worn, but it fits Kara’s hand just right. She smiles as Charlie attempts his first throw, the ball hitting the ground just before her feet.

“Try again, buddy! You can come closer!” She picks it up and throw it back to him.

Kara had used to play here, on the very same meadow, with Jeremiah just after her adoption. She had been quiet and reserved, the loss of her parents still a fresh memory in her mind. Jeremiah had lured her out of the house with the promise of picking berries and playing baseball that summer, and Alex had joined them on occasion. It had helped her come out of her shell, trust her new family and find joy in her life. Seeing Charlie laugh as his next attempt hit the ground as well, the realization overcomes her that she is somewhat repeating those experiences.

She swallows thickly. She misses Jeremiah, now more than ever. She knows Alex does, too, even if they don’t talk about it.

“Try again, buddy!” she calls as she throws the ball back, willing herself to enjoy their activity and not give in to memories from days long gone.

They take turns throwing and catching until they’ve tired themselves out, sitting on the grass and eating a few of the berries they had picked. Kara feels like she might go back to sleep at once and loathes the work day ahead of them. It’s Charlie who reminds her they have to go back and open the shop on time.

They’re turning left onto Harbor Road when two things happen at once. Firstly, the bells of the small church on Pine Street start chiming, letting them know it’s already 10 o’clock – they’re late. Secondly, Kara notices a horse carriage parked before their shop. Her heart is in her chest in a second, and she starts rushing so suddenly she almost collides with a man walking into the other direction.

The Danvers don’t know anyone who frequents their shop who rides in a carriage. Her first thought is that it’s Lena, even if the possibility is slim. Lena has always come to the shop in as-plain-as-possible clothing, never drawing attention to her status. Then she thinks it might be the police, giving them trouble for employing Charlie. The possibility is just as slim, but her step increases nevertheless. Next to her, Charlie is panting, trying to keep up with her.

When they reach the shop, Kara finds the door open, and she stops so abruptly on the threshold that Charlie bumps into her. For a moment she thinks she might be seeing wrong, and she blinks. But there she is, standing next to Alex, her hairdo and attire unfamiliar, but her kind face still the same.

“… Kelly?”

The two women seem to not have noticed Kara’s and Charlie’s arrival, because they startle and move away from each other. Kelly turns around, her eyes widening when she sees her.

“Kara! It’s been so long!”

Kara mumbles something in response. Disappointment spreads in her chest at not seeing Lena. Seeing Kelly there, however, brings about a whole new line of questions, and looking at Alex she is also unsure if she wants to hear what has brought Kelly back to the city.

As if reading her mind, Alex turns towards her as well. “Kara! It’s good that you two are back. Can you look after the shop? I’d like a minute with Kelly.”

Kara nods. There is a tremble in Alex’ voice that a stranger would overhear, but Kara can only imagine how her sister is feeling in this moment. Her best friend had married and moved to Tacoma almost two years ago, leaving Alex alone and solemn. While Tacoma isn’t far, the Danvers could not afford the streetcar, and Kelly had not been free to visit, either.

“I’m happy to see you both well, and to see your business thriving,” Kelly says to Kara, her voice friendly. “My husband heard of the gold and decided to visit Seattle for a business opportunity.” She laughs. “We arrived two days ago, and I see we are not the only ones. It was quite difficult to find an available room. Fortunately, he is a reasonable man and has no intention of going North.”

Kara only nods once more. “I’m happy to see you well, too, Kelly.” She smiles at the woman.

Once Alex and Kelly have gone upstairs, Kara and Charlie start working. No clients show up, and Kara imagines they must be driven away by the carriage in front of the shop. It doesn’t inconvenience her, however, as it gives her and Charlie more time to work on their existing orders.

Charlie is unusually chatty, and he excitedly talks about their baseball practice from earlier in the morning. “Kara, can we play baseball with Ruby next time? She said she will teach me!”

Kara laughs. “Sure thing, buddy! But we have to wait if Sam comes to visit us again, because I don’t know where they live.”

Charlie sags his shoulders a little, but then smiles. “Alright.”

A minute or so later, he perks up again. “Who is the woman visiting Alex? Is she rich?”

“Her name is Kelly,” Kara starts, then pauses. “She’s the sister of my friend James, from the reading room. She was once Alex’ best friend, but they haven’t seen each other in a long time.”

Charlie furrows his brows. If in concentration of the stitches he is sewing or in thought, Kara isn’t sure. “Like your friend Lena?”

Kara lets out a small huff. “That’s right, buddy.”

Given the fact that Charlie has only known Kara for a week and has never met Lena, she thinks to find it concerning how much he brings her up. However, she realizes it must be because she brings Lena up at every opportunity herself, carefully reading the paper each night for a chance of finding news on the Luthors.

Once again, the comparison between Lena and Kelly makes her pause. But just like the other day during her argument with Alex, she cannot seem to see through it completely. It would be unlikely, to have Alex and Kelly share the same proximity as she and Lena did on occasion. She knows that there are others – she knows of the Parisian dancer Lena so admires, she has read poems – and yet it seems inconceivable to her. She has known Alex and Kelly almost her whole life.

The sound of footsteps on the stairs interrupts her thoughts. She looks up to find Kelly coming into the shop, her hat pulled as low as possible, and a hand covering her face. She rushes towards the front door in quick steps, and Kara can barely hear the ‘Goodbye, Kara’ she murmurs before she climbs into the waiting carriage. After a beat of silence one of the horses lets out a nicker, and the carriage sets in motion, leaving behind only a cloud of dust.

Kara stares through the open door as the dust settles onto the ground. It takes her a moment to realize that Alex had not seen Kelly to the door, and another one for it to strike her as unusual. She gets up and tells Charlie to call if a client comes in, then makes her way through the backroom and up the stairs. A glance at the clock tells her it is almost lunchtime, and that Eliza will be back soon.

She finds Alex sitting on her bed in their shared chamber, head in her hands.

“Alex, what’s wrong?” she whispers, sitting down next to her. The bed squeaks under both their weight.

Alex says nothing, and it’s only then that Kara notices her chest heaving in silent sobs. She puts an arm around her shoulders. It causes Alex to look up in surprise. If it’s because Alex hadn’t heard Kara enter the chamber or because she had hoped, for a split second, that Kelly had come back, Kara isn’t sure.

Alex cries silently, leaning into Kara’s side. Kara keeps her close. She wonders when the last time was that they’ve shared a moment like this. She doesn’t know what happened with Kelly, but she knows that Alex hasn’t been herself since her friend had gotten married.

“What happened, Alex?” Kara attempts again, but Alex only shakes her head in response.

Kara sighs, but stays where she is, letting her sister know she will listen if she wishes to talk. She doesn’t know how long they sit there, but a while later Charlie calls for Kara as a customer seems to have entered the shop.

“Go” Alex whispers, her voice hoarse.

“Will you be alright?” Kara asks as she gets up.

Alex nods. “I will.”

Kara squeezes her shoulder, then rushes downstairs to help Charlie. Eliza comes back shortly after, and when Kara tells her of Kelly’s visit, there is more concern than surprise on her adoptive mother’s face. Eliza spends some time with Alex upstairs, but Alex does not join them for work, remaining in their chamber until dinner.

She still does not talk of Kelly or what had happened, and it makes Kara’s concern grow even more. Charlie, when he leaves, gives Alex a tight hug, and it brings a small smile to her face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading, and the kudos and comments! <3


End file.
